The Things I Never Told You
by KassieMD
Summary: This is one of those Tris-and-Tobias-knew-each-other-before-he-transferred kind of fanfic. Tris meets Tobias when she's about twelve and he's about fourteen. They're friends for about a year before Tobias confesses his love for Tris. They share their special moment the night of the Choosing Ceremony and Tris begins to feel sick a few weeks later. War will occur one year after. M/MA
1. Chapter 1

The Things I Never Told You

A/N: This entire story is going to be in Tris's Point of View. Right now Tris is 11, Tobias is 13, and Caleb is 15. Read the A/N at the end! I DON'T OWN ANYTHING.

Chapter 1: The Meeting

I've never been more excited to start the Middle Level at school. There are three "Levels" at my school; The Lower: ages four-eleven; The Middle: ages eleven-fifteen; and the Upper, also known as initiation. At the end of the Middle Level, you go through the Choosing Ceremony, where you choose where you are going to live for the rest of your life. You can choose only once and you can't go back. There are five sections which we call Factions. There Amity; the kind, Candor; the honest, Erudite; the smart ones, Dauntless the brave, and lastly my faction, Abnegation; the selfless. Everyone knows where they're supposed to be. Everyone except me.

Caleb and I are walking home from school when I hear the faint sound of someone crying. I'm taken back for a moment because no one in Abnegation ever cries; it'll brings unnecessary attention to one's self.

The harsh sobs become increasingly louder and I fear it'll call an adult's contemplation.

"Caleb, go on ahead. I think I want to spend some time alone." I say to my older brother.

"Are you sure Beatrice? This is where the Factionless live and I don't want you to get caught up with them." he says with true concern weaving through his words.

"I'm sure. I just was to take a detour." I say, sending him a convincing smile.

"Alright Beatrice, be home before dinner and no talking with boys." he make a sour face at the word 'boys'.

"Trust me Caleb, boys are the last thing I'm thinking about right now! I'll see you at home." I say while shooing him away. He turns back to me once more to wave, then he disappears around the corner. Once out of my sight, I turn toward the whimpers.

I hop over a fallen street lamp and peer into a huge abandon building. I see a clump of grey sitting on a broken slab of cement. Its body shakes violently and the cries almost burst my eardrums. I reach my hand out; attempting to soothe the sad person. I barely skim the person's coat with my fingertips and with not even a blink of an eye, I'm shoved again the wall. My back collides with the cold, hard concrete, sending a shiver down my spine. A strong arm is place underneath my chin, forcing me to take small, shallow breaths.

When my attacker sees I'm not the person he wants, he drops me on my ass. He. A boy?

"Sorry, I wasn't expecting anyone." he says. He must not be much older than me because his voice sounds...weak. He lets his arm drop and walks away with his head down.

"Why were you crying?" I ask, trying to make my voice sound gentle but instead it comes out hoarse and quiet. I clear my throat and try again. "Why were you crying?"

"I've never met a curious Abnegation before." he says, still not looking at me.

"I'm not most Abnegation, My name is Beatrice, you are?"

"I can see Beatrice, most girls would not talk to me."

"Who are you?" I say a little firmer. He turns his face towards me. His face is pale and his eyes are puffy pink. His eyes, all though bloodshot, are the bluest eyes I've ever seen.

"Tobias. Tobias Eaton." he says standing up straight. Eaton. Marcus Eaton. I remember a few years ago Mrs. Evelyn Eaton died from child birth. I remember my mother making banana-walnut muffins for her family. Tobias Eaton. The motherless son.

"Marcus's boy?" I ask, same quiet voice but clearer. He nods, but it's so little I almost didn't notice it. "Can I ask you why you were crying?"

"No," he takes a breath, "At least not now." this time I'm the one to nod weakly. "So..." he drags out. His face has turns back to a bronze tan and his eyes are no longer swollen, I can clearly see how blue they are. Like a storm over the ocean before the break of day.

"Do you want to walk home with me?" I ask, trying to make this as least awkward as possible.

"Um, yeah, sure." he says. I don't know where I got this little ounce of bravery, but I stick my hand out so he could take it. Shocked, he intertwines our hands together. Abnegation is not fond on someone touching someone else; especially the opposite sex.

We walk, hand-in-hand towards our identical, cement houses. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Tobias sneak little stares at me. I have no idea why though. I am not pretty or smart, just the opposite actually. I'm frail and boney. Pale and cold. Shy and an outsider. No one has ever look me in that kind of way. Abnegation girls "all look the same." Not on my opinion. There are so many girls my age, who boys have already asked their parents' permission to have an arranged marriage.

I can slowly feel Tobias's hand get sweaty and cold. When we walk up to our street, I see Caleb sitting on the front steps; waiting for me. I go to wave at him but he gets up and doesn't even bother to make eye contact with me; he has his gaze on something else. I slowly follow his stare and it connects with Susan. Oh, I think. As Tobias and I draw closer to our homes, which are right next door, he squeezes my hand once before letting it go. My hand feels cold and lonesome. It drops down to the side and sways there for a moment. Tobias and I stare at each other, before I see a small curve forming on his lips. A smile. Well, more like a smirk, but cute, small, and plain simple.

He turns from me and I let out a small sigh. So faint, I thought no one would hear it, but apparently Tobias did.

"See you later, Beatrice, okay?" he says, over his shoulder. I don't know why, but his small comment make my face burn and my stomach twist with excitement. I already know my cheeks are probably rosy and I have a girlish grin plastered on my lips.

He chuckles softly and I wheeze out a nervous giggle.

"Okay." I say.

Without another word, he slips into his house. I turn to walk away when I see Caleb on the steps again, one light brown eyebrow raised. He doesn't look amused or even pleased to see me. He has the look of shame written all over his eyes. I have never seen him this way. Almost like he's scolding me with only his eyes doing the talking.

"Beatrice, what did I say about boys?" he says, his voice is cold, like I'm a child who got caught doing something I shouldn't have. I hesitate before answering:

"He was sad, and I thought it would be selfless of me to help him throughout it and what about Susan?" I raise an eyebrow as well. His eyes dart away from mine, but I keep glaring at him. Sooner than later, he matches my eyes.

"Beatrice, I told you to stay away from boys, period. I don't like it when you disobey me. Dad and mom are going out to dinner with some other coworkers. We are to make a small dinner for ourselves, do our homework, and go to bed. Nothing more." he pauses to take a break. I nod to this new information. I turn to go inside, when Caleb snatches my wrist and squeezes it so hard, I wince. I jerk my arm back, indicating want him to let go, but him grip tightens. I bite my lip to stifle a scream as his nails dig into my skin.

"Caleb, what are you doing?" I ask in an urgent-painful-whimper.

"I never want to see or hear that you talked to that boy ever again, are we clear." his voice is low and cold. I nod faintly. He let's go of my wrist and it's all red with the blood collected from his death-grip. Tears are welling in my eyes and I blink fast to keep them from slipping out in public. I rush inside, sprint up stair to my colorless bedroom, where a hard, plain mattress awaits me.

I fall onto my bed- groaning as I hit it, it's like falling on a slab of wood- and burst into sobs. I hold my pillow to my face to make them softer.

The physical pain left from earlier this evening is durable, but the emotional pain lasts. I have never seen Caleb this enraged. He has never touched me to show his disappointment. I don't like this new Caleb. He has change. Maybe he is stressed out about the Choosing Ceremony in a couple weeks, but he had no right to treat me like that.

••~••~••

I must have fallen asleep because I hear a soft knock on my door. When I lift me head, there is a wet patch under my cheek. I wipe the dried tears and sleep out of my eyes, and smooth down my hair.

"Beatrice, can I come in?" Caleb asks gently. I don't want to see he's face right now, but I don't want to disobey him either. I nod meekly, then realize he can't see me. I clear my throat and say:

"Yes, you can," I say, my voice still shaky. The door opens with a creak. His eyes are bloodshot and his brows are crimson. I know he's been crying as well.

"Beatrice, I'm-I'm so-sorry-" his voices cracks and he drops to his knees, hands on his eyes, his sobs shakes his body so much I thought the neighbors would hear.

"Caleb, why did you hurt me?" I can feel the tears burning the back of my eyes and my vision blurs.

"I just do want you to get caught up with boys, and you're my little sister. I don't want you to get hurt by anyone. Especially another man. I'm sorry I hurt you. I lost my temper and said things I shouldn't have. Will you ever be able to forgive me?" there's a glimmer of hope in his eyes, I really so want to forgive him, I just think I can never trust him any time soon.

"I forgive you, Caleb. Just tell me why you don't want me to get caught up with boys, when you're always sneaking around with Susan." I say, getting my voice back.

"We've known Susan since I was three. She and I connect. I want to be with her, all the time and I know that sounds selfish, but I think I'm in love with her." his lips form a small smile. I could never think of Caleb as the selfish type. He has always been the most selfless person I know, besides my parents.

"If you're in love, then why are you so angry all the time?"

"I don't know if I'll stay in Abnegation." that small confession changes everything. Caleb leaving? I always knew Caleb was suited for the selfless life that Abnegation provides. He can't leave.

"Caleb, why do you say this?"

"I think I'll choose Erudite. They have always festinated me and the knowledge is always open."

I run over to him, propelling myself into his arms, the arms that just hurt me so few hours ago. I help him of the floor and we sit side-by-side on my bed for a long time.

"I'm so sorry, Beatrice." he says. "Come on I made a peace offering- also known as dinner." he says with a meager smile, which I return.

••~••~••

That night I dream about Tobias. Before he left, he put a small, gentle kiss on my cheek. I grab his hand to stop him and he locks eyes with me. I slowly move our faces together, that's when I spring out of bed; hyperventilating. My sheets are sweat-soaked and my mind is running wild. I have never, in my entire life, have had a dream about a boy, beside my father and Caleb. Especially a dream like that.

I look out my window that is facing the Eaton house. My mind wanders and I look in to see if Tobias in any of their windows. Nothing. All lights are off and not even the crickets are chirping. It's not yet dawn, but there are a few Factionless people out and about.

I'm about to turn back to my bed, when a flicker of movement catches my eye. Tobias is leaning against the window sill, looking up. Even as young as he is, he easily stands over six foot. I find myself staring at him. He's not the boy I met this evening. This boy looks strong and proud, not weak and frail. I smile to myself.

Suddenly, I see a hand waving at me. Tobias. He's signaling me? I blink a few to get barring and I see him pointing down. Down? Does he want to meet me? I hold out one finger, telling him to wait a minute.

I rush into my room and throw on an over coat-since I'm only wearing my nightdress. Dad and mom came home a couple hours ago, so I have to tiptoe through my house in hopes that my parents don't wake up. I slip out my back door and quietly hike across the road to the Eaton house.

••~••~••

A/N: Hah Cliffhanger! No, I'll be back next week and I need you guys to tell me if you want short chapters=more updates or longer chapters=I'll update when I'm finished. You decide. If you guys want long chapters, I'll update every Sunday night, if you guys want shorter chapters, I'll update Sunday and Wednesday NIGHTS. Sad to say I can't update during the day 'cause school, work, and family things due to the upcoming holidays! Once again this is chapter 1 of The Things I Never Told You, I'm starting off with them young, then in a few chapters I'll jump into Tobias's Choosing Ceremony and so on. Now I have read a story like this, but I only read it once- it was only a couple chapters long-and I could never find it again, but my story goes back farther than the other one, so yeah. If you know what that story is called PM me or something. Sorry for this extra-long A/N but I said what had to be said. One more thing: READ, REVIEW, FOLLOW, FAVORITE, AND HAVE AN AWESOME DAY/NIGHT!

Live Long And Prosper


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Secrets

Previously...  
>I slip out my back door and quietly hike across the road to the the Eaton house.<p>

The mid-fall chill drapes all around me, sending a small shiver down my spine. The moon light is just enough to see where I'm going, but not enough to stop my clumsy habits. I trip in a small pothole, stumble over a twig, and step on my own toe before I even hit the street.

I see a flash of light, and for a second I think I'm going to get caught, but it comes from the back door of the Eaton house. So I really am sneaking out in the middle if the night, on top of that, I'm meeting a boy. A boy that is older and has a mysterious past. I have never really seen Tobias at school, when he does, it's only to drop off some school papers and to collect some.

He has not been a very good influent to me. If I had never met him, I'd probably be in my hard bed; sleeping. As I make my way to his back porch, I feel a large, cold hand clamp around my shoulder, my stomach sinks. I bite my lip to stifle a squeak and turn around fast, whipping the unknown person with my golden hair. I blink fast, trying to clear the fuzzy edges around my eyes. Tobias stands behind me, chuckling quietly and rubbing his cheek; I join his laughter.

He puts one finger on my lips to silence me. Slipping his clammy hands into my warm ones, we head off down the street. Every time he or I step and brake a stick, he jumps back slightly and turns around wildly.

When we finally make it the the abandon warehouse, he lets out a heavy sigh. I spin around on one foot and cross my arms over my chest, raising a eyebrow in the process. He mimics me and strides across the big cement slab that I found him at early.

He shifts the slab back and forth; almost like he's trying to open it. And he does. To my surprise there is a large old door centered in the middle of the ground. He begins to descent down a steep stair case. I follow soon after.

When we have reached the bottom there is all kinds of Dauntless things hanging around. In one corner, there is a punching bag that looks like its on its last leg and some large gloves that look somewhat like a ducks feet and are heavily padded. On the opposite side of the room there is a table with some 'L' shaped metal contraption with some sleek knives, perfectly aligned in neat rows and right in the center of the training room there is a wooden board with three red circles painted on it; each circle engulfing the last. There's a musky sent that fills my nostrils. Sweat, blood, and mint.

"You like?" Tobias finally speaks up, but I have nothing to say. My mouth hangs loosely open and my eyes start to water from lack of blinking.

"What is this place?" I say, coming to my senses. I walk very so slowly around the room until I reach the table that the knives lay on. I pick up one of the 'L' shaped weapons, the cool metal sends a chill through me and I can barely raise my hand to ask. He immediately hits the floor. What's going on?

"Beatrice, put the gun down!" he scolds me. I put the 'gun' down slowly so I don't get into anymore trouble. He sighs and pushes himself off the ground on one swift motion. As he walks over to me, he dusts himself off. "Beatrice, guns are dangerous if you don't know how to use them properly. I don't want you or anyone else to get hurt. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sir. I'm sorry. I should go." I go to take a step, but he steps in my way and crosses his arms over his chest.

"I don't want you to leave, I just don't want you to get hurt either." he looks at me with a stern expression and his eyebrows pull together. A moment later I'm engulfed in his arms. Startled at first my impulse is to pull away, but then I think again and stay in his embrace. He wasn't trying to hurt my feelings, but protecting me. I should have known better that to go picking up random objects without permission.

We stay encompassed together for what feels like seconds, but I know it's been several minutes because my legs are starting to get tired. He is the first to pull away. He smiles at me and I look down, studying my slippers, hoping he can't see my burning cheeks.

"Do you want to learn?" he puts one finger under my chin se that I have to look into his navy eyes.

"Learn what?" my voice comes out shaky and quiet. I don't know why, but every time he touches me a surge goes through me and something twists my stomach. Shock, surprise, and fear replace my blood.

"How to shoot a gun." he says matter-of-factly.

"Oh, um, okay. Is it safe?" I ask innocently.

"Oh yes, as long as you know how to use it." he gives me a shy smile and clicks a long, round thing into the gun. "This is just a 22 handgun, so you should be strong enough to hold it." He hands me the gun and I wrap my fingers around the cold metal. Tobias chuckles slightly and comes behind me, as he stands behind me, he brings his hands down to mine and lifts the gun up to face the red circles.

"Focus on the smallest red circle. That's your target." his breath tickles the back of my ear and my face gets hot again. "Breath in, focus. Breath out, fire." he says slowly. I can feel his chest rising and falling against my back. I inhale and close one eye to center the ring. Then exhale and squeeze my index finger. The loud bang hurts my ears but the recoil is what actually hurt. Tobias stop it from coming too close to my face. My projectile is nowhere near the target.

"Looks like you could use some practice." he smirks.

"I'd like to see you hit the center." I challenge.

"Consider it done." he states. When he raises his arms, I can see the visible muscle contract. For his age, he looks about sixteen. Handsome and simple. Some girls might focus on the way his ears stick out slightly and the hook under his nose, but I find that it suits him. I'm so caught up in admiring him, when he pulls the trigger, it startles me and I jump back.

"You okay?" he asks. I shake my head to try and get the vibrations out of my ears.

"Yeah, just warn me the next time you fire." I smile. He has that effect on me. I used to not smile a lot because it's an expression of 'self-pleasure'. I look at the plank and there is a small hole in the center of the red circle.

"Your turn." he turns the gun in his hand so that I can grab the handle. Our fingers touch and a spark travels up my arm to my heart, then down to my stomach again.

After what feels like hours of breathing, squinting, firing, and hand rubbing, he puts down the gun and picks up a knife. He waved his hand to instruct me to follow.

"This is an old Dauntless throwing knife. It's the first one I bought. Well, more like trade," he smiles at the knife, probably remembering the memory. "Anyways, do you want to learn how to throw it?" I nod, with a huge grin on my face. I'm starting to get tired, but being with Tobias, I could stay up forever.

Like the gun, he stands with a straight back and squared off shoulders. He bends his elbow all the way back, then in one swift movement, thrusts his arm out. Using his wrist the make the blade go end over end and the point plunges into the broad. It sticks. Dead center. And we are at least fifty feet away. My mouth drapes out as if I have no jaw.

"Your up." he says, with a hint of pride in his voice. Like the shooting practice, he stands behind me and coaches me in detail.

Once again, my hands are sore and my feet are starting to get strained from all this standing.

"Tomorrow?" he asks. There's a pleading look in his eyes.

"Sure, what time?" I say hesitantly.

"Same time, we'll work on your aim and maybe introduce the punching bag." he grins at me. "We should get going, don't want to be late for your first day in the Middle Level tomorrow."

I giggle. "No, that wouldn't be good."

"Beatrice?"

"Yes, Toby?" I snicker at the new nickname I just gave him.

"Toby? I like it, Tris." I blush at my new nickname. "Are you going to tell anyone about this place?" he gestures around him.

"No, Toby. It'll be our little secret."

A/N: Thank you for all you wonderful comments and for favorite-ing & following! Have I ever told you guys I love you guys? Well, I do! I hope you guys liked this chapter and look out for Chapter 3 next Sunday! Remember to FFR (follow-favorite-review) I'm going to set a review goal for about five more reviews. Thanks again guys!

Live Long & Prosper


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Keeping Tension**

_Previously...__  
><em>_"Toby? I like it, Tris." I blush at my new nickname. "Are you going to tell anyone about this place?" he gestures around him. ___

_"No, Toby. It'll be our little secret."_

I wake in a jolt. I had the oddest dream. Toby and I were training... No, that wasn't a dream that was a memory, of last night. Oh my god, I'm going to be in so much trouble if my faction finds out Toby and I are spending time together. We'll be in even more trouble if they find out we were training like the Dauntless do. I have a pounding headache, so I slowly lie back down and put the heels of my hands to my eyes, trying to rub the sleep away. My biceps and shoulders are sore from the shooting practice and my feet are aching. After a few moments of peace, I bolt up and sprint into the bathroom. I completely forgot that today's the day I start school in the 'Middle Level'.

As I'm washing the soap out of my hair, when I hear a knock on the bathroom door.

"Beatrice, please hurry. We can't be late." I open my mouth to say 'okay', but instead I get a mouth full of soap. I gag and cough while Caleb continues to call my name and ask if I'm okay.

"Yes Caleb, I'm fine I just swallowed some soap." I hear him laughing. "Okay, then next time you get soap in your mouth, I'll laugh at you." When I finish talking, I stick my hand in my mouth and use my fingers to brush out any of the leftover cleanser.

I pat my hair dry and slip on my robe, so that I can sneak into my bedroom. After getting ready to go, I head down stairs to grab a small bowl of oatmeal for breakfast. My mother is at the stove, I assume making our meal, while my father is sitting at dining table, reading the newspaper. Caleb sits on a bar stool, watching our mother cook.

"Good morning, sweetheart." my mother greets me. "How did you sleep?"

"Good morning to you too, and I slept well. Yourself?" I ask. We usually don't ask about our parents, but I'm just being polite.

"Oh, um, well, but last night I thought I heard the back door close, but when I check, everything was locked up tight. Did you guys hear anything?" I feel like I just swallowed stone, and my throat is closing; making it hard to breath. I never lie to my parents. This is harder than I thought it was going to be. Caleb breaks the silence.

"No. I didn't hear anything, Beatrice?"

"No...No I was asleep." I wish I wouldn't stutter when I get nervous.

"Mmm, maybe I was dreaming..." She says, easily.

"Maybe..." I say with an innocent smile. There is a long awkward silence, then Caleb speaks up again.

"Beatrice, we should get going."

"Okay," I hug my parents' goodbye and Caleb and I head to school. On our way there, we pass the warehouse I was at last night. I feel the butterflies in my stomach begin to flutter as I think of what will happen tonight with Toby.

Caleb and I walk in silence until we come to the huge front door to our school.

"Have a good day, Beatrice." Caleb says while pulling me into a side hug and a small kiss on my hairline.

"You too, Caleb." I closed my eyes and sigh. He gives me a gentle squeeze before letting go. He opens the door for me and he turns left to go to his classes. I walk down the main hallway feeling really out of place. Everyone here is older than me and I really don't have ant friends beside Susan and Robert-who are more neighbors than friends.

When I step up to the office, an Amity women in a loose red dress greets me.

"Oh, hello dear! How can I help you?" her voice is oddly annoying and high.

"Um, yes I just started the Middle Level and I need to find out what, when, and where my classes are." I say coolly.

"Okay sweetheart, name?"

"Beatrice Grace Prior," she sits on a plush chair and punches in a series of letters.

"Ah, here we go, hun. I hope you have a great first day." she smiles an inhumanly large grin. I take a glance at my paper work.

Locker Number: 0119 Combination: 0129

Faction History: Mr. Kang; Room: 1127  
>Art: Mrs. Reyes; Room: 0918<br>Volunteer Hours: Mr. Eaton; Room: 1024  
>Lunch<br>Biology: Mrs. Matthews; Room: 0607  
>Physical Fitness: Mr. Wu; Room: 0716<p>

All the faction leaders have to teach the younger children, in my case I have all of major ones. The Faction system is set up so that way during the Lower and Middle Levels of school, we are taught the morals and activities of the other factions. All factions must take the classes. It doesn't matter if you are Amity or Dauntless, at the end of the Middle Level you must have at least fifty hours of volunteer work behind you, thirty-five hours of science, and forty hours of some kind of physical activity.

~..~..~

The Middle Level classes aren't so different from the Lower Level classes. Today was all about learning the ins and outs of the classroom and getting to know everyone. The day is not quiet over yet. I still have P.F.

When I walk into the classroom, all I see is black. Dauntless black. Wonderful, I got the class with the most reckless Dauntless teenagers. There's three Amity giggling in the corner and about five or six Candor girls discussing the differences between makeups. I'm the only Abnegation in the room. Dauntless make up the rest of the noise.

"Are you lost, Stiff?" a dark haired, stocky Candor boy says to me.

"Um, no, I'm in the right place." I say, while shaking my head.

"Yeah, sure...get lost." He sneers.

"I'm not going to fail this class. Now, if you'll excuse me-" he laughs, harshly.

"Excuse you? Hell, what is this, an Abnegation classroom?" There's a hefty Candor girl and a red-headed boy who snicker at his comment.

"No. Now get out of my way." I say trying to make my voice sound intimidating.

"Look at the little girl, who thinks she's all tough!" he yells for the whole class to hear. There's a few people who laugh alongside this idiotic Candor, but most just roll their eyes in annoyance to this childish act.

I let my head down as I walk to the back of the room. As I come up to a desk in the back, more people fill the room. Some darker-skinned boys are goofing off as they make their way back to where I'm sitting.

I try to make myself look smaller, in hopes that they'll leave me alone and not tease me. But, as always, my hopes come crashing down when the taller of the two, literally crashes down on the seat next to me. I already know he's Dauntless just by one glance. Black clothing, a few piercing here and there and one thing the other boy does not. A small tattoo of a snake wrapping around his ear.

"Hi, I'm Uriah! What's your name?" he thrusts his hand out. I have no idea what he's doing, so I just assume it's a Dauntless greeting. I also notice how young he looks, probably around my age. He raises an eyebrow in confusion, but then lets he's hand drop. "Sorry, I forgot that your kind isn't fond on touching."

"Its okay, and my name is Beatrice." I respond.

"Nice to meet you, Beatrice." Right then the other boy who looks likes Uriah, takes his seat behind Uriah. "And this is my brother, Zeke. Zeke this is the 'new girl', Beatrice." he says pointing at me.

"Hello, Beatrice. I am so sorry that you got stuck back here with Uri," Zeke playfully shoves his brother.

"No worries, I can handle myself." I say, smirking.

I daydream for most of the class period until it comes to the introducing one another. A tanned skin Candor girl is the first to stand.

"My name's Christina, Candor, and I'm eleven years old." she has a high pitched voice that is both welcoming and charming without trying. A few others go, but I don't bother to listen. I know it's rude, but I will probably never talk to them. I learned that the smart-mouthed Candor who harassed me earlier is named Peter and his 'friends' are just as bad as he is. When it's my turn I slowly get up and clear my throat.

"My name is Beatrice, Abnegation, and I'm eleven as well." I state fast, I could sit back down. I hate calling attention to myself.

After school is over I walk home alone, because apparently Caleb got sick and went home earlier. As I'm carelessly walking down by the warehouse, I feel a familiar hand latch onto my shoulder. This time, I don't flinch.

"How was your first day?" Tobias asks as I turn to face him.

"Okay, I guess, I mean it would be a lot most fun if you were there." I can feel my cheeks start to burn and I immediately regret saying those words aloud. I stare at our shoes- just a mere inches between us.

"Oh, would it?" He teases me. I look back at him with a raised eyebrow. He laughs out loud. "I'm just kidding," he smiles.

"I figured." We stand there in the middle of the street in a comfortable silence.

"I'll see you tonight?" He says after a while.

"Yes," I say, trying to hide-and failing- a grin. He goes in for a hug and this time I don't jump back instead I embrace him as well. When I snake my arms around his waist to pull him closer, he winces.

"Are you hurt?" I ask, pulling away from our hug.

"Something like that. Knock three times on the hatch and wait, I'll come and let you in, okay?" I nod. "Bye Tris." He turns his back and strides away. I'm not sure, but I thought I saw something dark between his shoulder blades, staining his jacket. Mud maybe.

~..~..~

After everyone's asleep and there is no lights on in any of the houses, I sneak out the back door; making sure not to make a sound.

It's darker that is was yesterday because the previous night was a full moon and a few of the neighbors hadn't gone to bed yet. I travel by muscle memory and without breathing. I know this is wrong. Against my faction's protocol. Against my family's wishes and my own. But something draws me to this boy. Maybe I'm just going through that coming-of-age rebellion stage and when it's over I'll be the one to pay the cost.

When I get to the warehouse I knock on the door three times-just as Tobias told me to- and wait for his answer. A few moments later the cement door swings open and I stare into the mysterious blue eyes that hold so many secrets, waiting to be told.

"Are you coming or not?" he breaks through my daze. I blush, knowing I was staring for far too long.

"Uh, um, yeah!" I say trying to not let my voice go squeaky. It does anyway. He chuckles at me for flustering words. My face gets hotter and I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks and ears. When we get to the bottom of the latter, I playfully smack his arm. He fakes gasps and puts a pout on his flirtatious lips. I seem to stare at his lips longer that I had hoped for and he laughs out loud.

"You're so mean to me, I don't know why I even hang out with you!" I tease him.

"Because I'm so irresistible!" he says in a 'isn't it obvious' tone. It's my turn to laugh. Before I met Tobias I maybe laughed once or twice and that was only around Caleb. Now in days, it feels little I might cry if I laugh to hard.

"In your dreams," I say in a monotone, dead-like voice. This causes us to laugh again and I hold on to his shoulder for support.

"I like your laugh," he mummers. I barely hear through my giggles.

"Why? It's so...plain." I furrow my brow and bite my lip.

"It suits you, just like your lip and cheek biting," he raises an eyebrow an me. I stop biting my lip and respond:

"I guess you are right. I do, do that." I confess.

"Mmm... We should get started since I know you have to get up early." I nod and walk beside him to his 'training room'. We stop in front of the punching bag. "I'm going to show you how to win a fight with minimal damage to yourself. I will demonstrate." He shakes off his grey jacket which leaves him in a tight, dark-grey V-neck. "You might want to take off your jacket, it helps to have moveably." He states. I don't usually undress in front of anyone, but if I want to learn how to fight-and properly-I'll have to make some exceptions. I unbutton the blouse slowly, then shrug it off to the floor, leaving me in a light grey tank top. I notice how to Toby looks at my quite frequently. I blush profusely and the tips of my ears burn with nervousness.

He shows me some basic punches and kicks before letting me try. The bag doesn't nearly swing as much as it did when Tobias was punching it. He walks around me slowly. Inspecting every jab I throw. Every swipe of my forehead were the sweat has collected. My breathe hitches when I feel his long fingers and his clammy palms come in contact with my abdomen and the small of my back.

"Keep tension here and lock your wrists. It'll help you to not get a sprained wrist and help pack a little more _punch_ to your punch." he smirks. I nod and incorporate his suggestions. He was right. The bag swings slightly more and my wrists don't hurt as much.

After an hour or so, we call it quits and walk home together. Before he walks to his side of the street, he plants a small, warm kiss on my cheek. I smile and am thankful for the darkness for concealing me burning face. He returns the smile, then heads home.

Once on my room, I flop on my mattress and recalling that little kiss. If only it was placed a couple centimeters south. 

~..~..~

**A/N: Aren't they just so damn adorable? I personally think it's cute when little kids fall in love! Once again, thank you guys so much for your wonderful reviews and PM's. Now, I know these chapters are slow and uneventful, but these first few chapters are going to be about how they fall for each other and then I'll jump into the juicy stuff and fluff;) the beginning chapters are more going to be fillers. Sorry but I just don't want to just into the actual story yet! I actually have this story planned out. So stay tuned for more chapters! Please review guys, I like to know what you guys think and throw in your own ideas. Thanks for following and favorite-ing as well! ******

**Live long & Prosper**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Complications

Previously...  
>After an hour or so, we call it quits and walk home together. Before he walks to his side of the street, he plants a small, warm kiss on my cheek. I smile and am thankful for the darkness for concealing me burning face. He returns the smile, then heads home.<p>

Once in my room, I flop on my mattress and recalling that little kiss. If only it was placed a couple centimeters south.

I toss and turn all night, unable to find a comfortable angle. Every time I close my eyes, my mind flickers back to the kiss, making me get butterflies and my mind starts to race with impossible ideas. It was so soft, and coming from a guy's lips, you wouldn't expect that. Or at least I thought it wouldn't be. I shut my eyes closed and attempt to count to a hundred. Trying to at least get some sleep.

Once again the image of us flashed behind eyelids. I groan in frustration. I figure I'm not going to get much sleep tonight, so I quietly tip-toe to Caleb's and mine's conjoined bathroom. After working out with Tobias, I'm quite sweaty and dirty. Since we live in a concrete house, the shower doesn't make much noise.

I turn the temperature to a mildly scalding and let the hot water work the knots out of my muscles. Standing in the steam makes me drowsy and my eyelids heavy. I decide to sit in the tub and let the water wash over me. I reflect on my day. One thing has stayed with me the whole day. A headache. This throbbing pain that sits between my brows, on the bridge of my nose. My back presses up on the cool tile of the tub, sending a shiver from head to toe. I bring my knees to my chest and rest my head on the caps.

_Tobias and I are walking hand-in-hand to our warehouse when he stops abruptly. My heart starts to pound my chest and my fingertips being to tingle. ___

_"Tobias? What's wrong?" I ask him, while slightly shaking his shoulder. When he doesn't answer I grab both of his shoulders and shake him violently. "Tobias! Answer me! Tobias!" I scream in his face, but it remains slack and blank. ___

_I take his cheeks between my hands and force his eyes to mine. He looks right through me. Like I'm not even there. ___

_"Beatrice?" A voice calls from s distance. I turn in every direction, but only to see nothing. When I turn my attention back to Toby, the front of his shirt is pooling with blood and he doesn't do anything to stop it. ___

_"Tobias! Your bleeding!" I wail. I press my hands to his abdomen to try and stop him from losing too much blood. ___

_"Beatrice..." The voice whispers again. Blood beings spewing out of his nose and mouth. Finally after what feels like hours of him not seeing my he looks into my eyes. ___

_"You did this to me..." and he fades away. His skin is the first to fall from his body, followed by his muscles and nerve endings. His skeleton is left lying on the street. A moment later it turns to ash. ___

_"Toby! Toby! Tob-by!" I choke on his name. I scream. _

"Beatrice!" The familiar voice yells at me. My eyes fly open and I bolt upright. There's a banging on the door and Caleb and my parents are shouting my name. The water turned to ice and my neck is sore. My eyes are puffy and swollen from crying and I have a big red spot on my forehead were my head rested on my knees.

"Beatrice!" my family screams. The banging gets louder and the door starts to splinter. My mother is the first inside the bathroom. She rips the towel for the hanging rack and runs over to me. She turns the water off and places the towel over my mid-section. She pulls me onto her lap and strokes my hair.

"Shhh... It's okay, Beatrice. It's just a nightmare... Shhh, its okay," she soothes me. I grip her shoulders, pulling my face to her chest and sob uncontrollably.

I don't know how long I sit on her lap, but when she cradles me in her arms—presumably to take me to my room—I can see the dark blue night turning to a golden dawn. My head is spinning and I have a massive headache. I feel like I've been hit with an emotional train. All I can think of is Tobias. Is he hurt? Is he okay? What kind of dream—nightmare—was that? Before I can ask anything, I need to see him. But my parents will never allow that. Maybe I could sneak out again, I'm supposed to anyways tonight. Until then, I think I will give into the darkness that is pulling me away from conscious.

~..~..~..~

I jolt awake. Once again having that same nightmare about Tobias. My body is damp with sweat and the back if my neck is burning. I look through my window and find that it is still day and I probably should get going to school. Even though I'll be late, I can't completely skip school. I quickly rise from my bed and immediately regret it. My head slices in two from the pain and a stuffy feeling encompasses my nose.

I slowly swing my legs over, hoping that some walking will help me get through this illness. I use the railing on the steps to help me get down stairs. I come into an empty room. I call out for my family:

"Mom? Dad? Caleb?" No return calls. "Anyone?" I squeak out. I hate being alone at the house. No one to bug or talk to. No one to even just stare at. I subconsciously walk onto the kitchen quietly. I don't know why I'm so quiet. There's no one around.

I see a small slice of paper resting on the center counter. It reads:

_Beatrice,__  
><em>_I'm sorry we left you after last night, but there was an emergency meeting that all council members had to attend. Caleb had to go to school, it would be selfish of him if he were to skip it. He will also bring home your homework. I told the school that you weren't yourself and you just need a day to recover. There's some chicken soup in the cooler for you to warm. We love you. ___

_Forever and always. ___

_Mom, Dad, and Caleb_

So they just left? I walk over to the cooler and pick out a well-sized bowl of broth with a sprinkle of chicken. I dump the contents into a pan over the stove to it warm up. I stand over the stink and stare into nothing out the window. This is how Tobias feels every day. I wonder if at night that is the only time he has to be himself. My stomach growls which brings me back to reality. I stir the soup once then help myself to it.

I end up reading some old book I found in Caleb's room. It's about a girl named Hazel and she has some weird sickness that makes it hard to breathe. It's funny, but we have the same middle name. She meets a boy with one leg and they start to fall for each other. I find it odd that Caleb would know such a book. It's odd that Caleb has any books at all stashed away. Books are for Erudite and Erudite only. Right when they are going to a faraway land my brother get home. I shut the book and run it to his room; afraid that he will scold me for taking his things.

"Hey, Beatrice, how do you feel?" he asks while approaching me.

"Okay, I guess. I still have a slight headache." I make my point by rubbing my hairline.

"Well, you should go lie down. I'll make dinner." he begins to descent down stairs. I go into my room and stare up at the grey ceiling.

~.,~..~..~

After dinner and everyone has gone to sleep I slip out of bed and crawl out the back door. I need to talk to Tobias about my dream and what I saw yesterday on his jacket. It looked a lot like the blood in my dream. Is he hurt? Why wouldn't he tell me? Does he not trust me? I don't even realize that my thoughts have distracted me so much that I'm already at the warehouse.

I knock and the door swings open, but when I look down no one is there. I dip down into the training room and find Tobias sitting on the mat crying. He looks just like he did the first day I met him. I rush over to him and engulf him in a hug. Which earns me a painful hiss and more cries of pain.

"Tobias! Tobias, what's wrong?" I ask fanatically.

"N-Nothing. Nothing's wrong... I-I just f-fell," he stutters which leads me to believe he's lying.

"No! Don't tell me _nothing's wrong_, when you clearly need help," I say it so fast I don't think he understood me. "Please, just answer me truthfully," I plea softly.

"I can't. He'll kill me and then you," he sobs.

"I won't let anyone touch you or me. Please tell me," I brush the hair off his forehead with the tips of my fingers. My hand slides down his face and cups his cheek. I gently wipe away the tears with my thumb.

"M-my f-f-fathe-r...he hits m-me," he speaks. I sit there, frozen. Marcus Eaton, abuses his own flesh and blood?

"How long?" I ask when I finally collect myself.

"E-ever since my mother died," he says, a little more coherent. If I do the math right then that means...

"7 years?" I ask. He nods. "Is that why you were crying the first day I met you?" another nod. "Do you want help... I mean with wrapping your wounds or something?"

"No, its fine. Just, please, don't tell anyone," he says looking into my eyes.

"Of course, whatever you want." I say, giving him a weak smile.

"And thanks...for not looking at me like some kicked puppy or something." he returns my smile and wipes his face with the sleeve of his jacket.

"Well, you're not. I don't give pity to those who don't need it." he hugs me this time and I avoid his back. I really want to tell him to tell someone else, but then again, it's his life.

~..~..~..~

A/N: Hey guys sorry it hasn't been every eventful, but I promise you that this will start to pick up in these next few chapters! Thanks for all your wonderful comments. I honestly thought no one would check out this story, but I only have 4 chapters up and I got thirty-something followers(which I appreciate a lot!). Please guys, review. I love hearing your guy's opinions and suggestions. See you all next week!

Live Long & Prosper


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Trying New Things****  
><strong>**A/N: Sorry for this at the beginning of a chapter, but I need to clarify some thing. When Tris met Tobias, she was 11 and 9 months and Tobias was 13 and 11 months. I fast-forward two years in this chapter so now Tris is 13 and 9 months and Tobias is 15 and 11 months. And estimating in the book, I'd say the Choosing Ceremony was in the late Spring time, so I'm going to place the Ceremony in May. Their ages will play a key role later in this story. Sorry I didn't say that in the first chapter.**

_Previously...__  
><em>_"And thanks...for not looking at me like some kicked puppy or something." he returns my smile and wipes his face with the sleeve of his jacket. ___

_"Well, you're not. I don't give pity to those who don't need it." he hugs me this time and I avoid his back. I really want to tell him to tell someone else, but then again, it's his life._

Tobias and I are sparring on the mat when he pins me by my shoulders.

"Come on, Tris. I thought I taught you better that this," he gives me a wicked smile that tells me that he's about to do something I won't like.

"Tobias, please, don't do what I'm thinking you'll do," I beg him, but of course he defies me and he's hands crawl up the sides of my body and he presses them to my rib cage—we have gotten a lot more comfortable with each other over the years—making me shriek. I try to push him off, but his weight gives him an advantage.

"To-Tobias! St-stop! Stop!" I say, breathlessly. I know he's weak spot, but I kind of enjoy him on top of me. I playfully smack his hands trying to make him stop. Which just makes him tickle me even more so.

"Come on, Tris, I know you know how to pin me," he taunts me. His left hand dips down to thigh and he gently squeezes, making me squirm and my eyes begin to form tears. When he does this I lose all control, and I burst into uncontrollable laugh. I can feel my face beginning to burn and my heart is about to leap out of my chest. I swing my right leg over his shoulders—so that way it's across his neck and shoulders—and clamp my legs shut so that he falls to the ground on his back. I quickly get up and pin his shoulders with my knees. It's kind of awkward to have my crotch in his face, but that's the way he taught me. He said I would have the advantage if I were to act quickly and use one-hundred percent of my body weight.

"See, I told you," he smirks and I release him. I thrust my hand forward and he takes it, nearly pulling me to the ground, while pushing himself off of it.

"Yeah, well, I was the one to actually do the work," I smile and dust off the imaginary dust that is on my back. He start to clean up the training room. "Do you want help?" I gesture to the mess that we call our hiding hole.

"Um, yeah, sure, that would be great!" he says happily with a large grin on his face. I return the smile and walk over to help him pick up. About half an hour later, we crawl up the ladder to the warehouse above. I go first and I look down to check to see if he's alright, but I catch him staring at me.

"Can I help you?" I ask, my cheeks begin to redden and so does his face. I giggle at him and push the hatch open. Once out he takes a deep breathe. He does that every time we leave the training room. I'm beginning to think that he might feel trapped in there, but I have never asked.

"Hey, Tris?" He asks it so quietly, would you think I didn't hear him.

"Yeah?" I answer.

"Do you want to, um...do you want to come to Amity with...with me?" He stumbles over his words. I find it quite cute, actually. Even in the darkness I can see his cheeks turn scarlet. I slightly giggle.

"Um, sure! I'd love to! When?" I ask quietly while still being enthusiastic.

"Like...now? I understand if you don't want to..." He looks down at his shoes like he's embarrassed to ask me.

"Tobias, how long have you known me?"

"About two years," he answers with a confused look on his face.

"And when have I _ever_ said no to you?" I ask with a smirk. He grins at me and offers me his hand which I take and we set off to the train. A couple months ago, Tobias taught me how to get on and off of a moving train. At first it was difficult with my dress and slacks being two sizes too big, but then Uriah—we have also gotten close too—conned some Dauntless girls into giving me some of their old training outfits. I have used them ever since. Since I don't want my family to find out I have been training like I have, I keep the clothes in the training room. It's kind of uncomfortable to change clothes when Tobias is there, but he usually respects me enough to turn around while I change. Once in a while I catch him sneaking little glances my way, but I dismiss them and keep changing.

As soon as we're on the train, Tobias slides down one of the walls, leaving me space beside him. I take the seat next to him and rest my head on his shoulder. I'm grateful for the loud wind, because I sigh. Tobias turns his head towards me and plants a small kiss on the top of my head. I've notice that he has been kissing me more than he used to when we first met. I suppose it's natural for us to become so comfortable with each other. I decide to be brave and ask him.

"Tobias, why do you always kiss me on top of my head?" I say shyly. In response, he chuckles and give me another kiss on my hair line.

"Because, if I can't kiss your lips, then I'll settle for anywhere else head." I adjust my head so I can look up into his royal blue eyes. He cheeks turn a crisp red and his eyes dart away from mine. I giggle about his reaction to his own words.

"I-I—um, that came out wrong, I mean it didn't, but...I'm making this worst, aren't I?" he scratches the back of his neck.

I smile. "Yes, you _are _making a deeper hole for yourself."

"I mean, Tris, I like you...like a lot, but I don't want to break our friendship apart. Do you know what I mean?" His eyes look like they are filled with disappointment, loss, and maybe...lust?

"No, Tobias I don't know what you mean..." I breathe out. He brings his hand up to my face and rests it on my cheek, with his fingers entangling themselves in my hair. We stare into each other for what seems like hours, soaking in the feeling of being close to one another. The fall night air is cool, but not cold. Everything seems to have stopped.

I can hear the sound of my own heartbeat over the wind. His lips are plump and his eyes are as blue as the seas. His eyes tell everything about him. His emotion, his passion, and the people he enjoys being around. When we first met it was his eyes that made me intrigued. I want to know more. I need to know more.

I feel his hand brush one of my loose hair's back behind my ear and his thumb caress my lips. He looks once more into my eyes, until he presses his soft, plush lips to mine own. At first I'm startled and don't kiss back, but after a moment my arms crawl up his chest and go around his neck. His arms snake around my waist and he pulls me onto his lap.

We stay like this for God knows how long until we have to break the kiss for air. Tobias leans his forehead onto mine, collecting his breaths, while I collect mine. I close my eyes and smile. I just kissed my best friend.

"Wow," he says, breathless.

"I know," I say slightly blushing.

"I think we'll _have_ to do that again,"

"I don't know, maybe," I smile, flirtatiously.

"Maybe?" He questions.

I decide to play with him a little, "Yeah, _maybe_," he stays silent for a while before speaking again:

"Are you pulling my strings, Tris?"

I pull on the front if his shirt, bringing him centimeters from my lips, "No..." and I press my lips to his. Without a second's hesitation he kisses me back. He smashes his lips against mine so hard that my mouth opens. I sigh. It feels go to express something I've been hiding for two years. Like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I can finally can breathe.

I rest my head on his shoulder and close my eyes slightly. I draw small circles on his chest, and I can feel him shiver beneath me.

After a moment of silence I decide to speak up. "What are we now, Tobias?"

"What do you mean?" he creases his brows together.

"That kiss...what does it mean for us? Like are we still friends?"

"Tris, I think that kiss means that we are more than _just friends_," he smiles.

"Good," I look up into his eyes and return his smile. Over his shoulder, I can see the Abnegation sector coming into view. We must have passed Amity. I give him a quick peck on his lips and jump out of the train cart. I hear him laugh and follow me. I giggle while regaining my balance.

We walk side-by-side with Tobias's arm around my waist. When we get to the middle of the street that divides our two houses, he gives me a long, passionate kiss that makes me want to melt. We say our goodbyes and I plant a small, gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth and sneak back into my house.

**A/N: Okay if that first kiss really sucked, then tell me! I have never written a passionate kiss scene, so review and tell me how to improve! Thanks for reviews, follows, and favorites guys! Until next week...******

**Live Long & Prosper**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Starts with Goodbye ****A/N: This is one year later because they pretty much do the same thing and I figured you guys didn't want a bunch of filler chapters...so yeah...******Warning: This is a rated-M fanfic, if you don't like lemons, then skip this chapter, the next chapter will sort of insight you of what happened****

_Previously...__  
><em>_We walk side-by-side with Tobias's arm around my waist. When we get to the middle of the street that divides our two houses, he gives me a long, passionate kiss that makes me want to melt. We say our goodbyes and I plant a small, gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth and sneak back into my house._

"Tris, I'm sorry, but I _have_ to transfer. My father...I just can't stand it anymore. Please don't be angry with me, and please understand that I never wanted to leave you," Tobias tries to reason with me. My eyes burn and my body trembles. Tobias is holding me in the center of the training mat. The past year has been the best time of my life. Granted I have only been on this planet for fourteen years, but I've never been happier. Today was his aptitude test and tomorrow is his Ceremony.

"Tobias p-please-e, don't leave me. You me-mean too much to me to just get up-p and leave," I sob. I know I'm being selfish now, but I can't stand to live two years without him.

"Tris, you can too come and be with me...in two years," his voice trying to stay firm while staying soft.

"I know I—I just don't want you to leave," I weep onto his chest.

"Shh..." he clears his throat, "Tris, please stop crying. I hate seeing you this way."

"I—I'm sor-sorry," I hug him tighter. Tonight is the last night we have together and I plan on savoring it. His eyes have never looked so blue and so sad, his hands have never been so warm and loving, and his kisses have never been so passionate and raw. I need him, all of him, even if it is just for a few moments.

I press a small, gentle kiss on his chest, up to his neck, across his cheek, and end I on his lips. He instantly kisses me back with so much love and desire. He glides his tongue on my bottom lip, asking to be let in. With me being so emotional right now, I don't fight it. My arms are locked around his neck and his hands squeeze my waist, not in a ticklish way, more like he's trying to hold on to me.

He rains little kisses all over my face before settling on my neck. I moan in response. He presses me up against the wall and I wrap my legs around his waist. His hand travels down and around to thigh, where he softly squeezes it. I capture his lips once again and sip my hands under the collar of his shirt. I feel his back muscle contract at my touch and he groans into our kiss. His other hand slide beneath my shirt and continues to travel upward, leaving my skin heated. He pulls away from our locked lips and he tugs at my shirt, as if asking me if it's okay. I only nod because the ability to speak has left me. I raise my arms up and we break the kiss for only a second, just so he could pull up my shirt. But when his eyes loon down towards my chest, I press my body closer to the wall and use my hands to cover myself. I keep my head down and when he pulls my chin up so that way I come face to face with him. I dart my eyes away from his, expecting to see them displeased and disappointed, but to only find a look of desire and hunger.

"Do you know how beautiful you are?" he whispers in my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. "I have no words..." and he's back to kissing my neck. I loosen up my hands around myself and tighten them around Tobias. He leaves a trail of warm, wet kisses up from my neck, down to my collarbone, until he hits the seam of my bra. I close my eyes and moan as he kisses one of my nonexistent breast through the grey fabric. He caress my other one on the side with is thumb, then that hand migrates to my back, were the clasp of my bra is, I squirm. When the two ends fall to my sides I gasp and let the straps drop from my shoulders. He continues to suck my sensitive skin until he encloses his mouth around my right harden peek. I shudder at the sensation it gives me. I feel short of breathe and my stomach clenches.

"Tobias, I—I can't breathe," I stutter.

He chuckles against my skin and says, "That means you like it." And it's true. I absolutely love what his mouth is doing to me. I breathe faster and I release the feeling inside me. Tobias seems pleased about his handy work, but he is still fully dressed, while I'm completely at his mercy. I bite my lip and begin to lift his shirt up and over his head. When I gaze at his bare chest, the heat rises to my face. He is so perfectly formed. Perfect chest, perfect abs, perfect everything. And he is doing things with me. Me of all people. I'm skinny, flat-chested, pale, bony, and...plain.

"No," he kisses between my breasts. "You're lean, perfect size, porcelain, and beautiful. You're so perfect in your own way, and you don't even see it," he continues to drizzle kisses all the way down until he comes across my shorts. "You are perfect and I'm the lucky one."

"Tobias..." I moan as he takes off my pants. When they fall to the floor my stomach twist in fear. I've never wanted something so bad, but also scared of it too. When he picks me up unexpectedly, I squeak. He lays me down on the training mat and I spread my legs so that way he can fit between them. The mat has the smell of us on it. Sweat, blood, and my tears. He sucks on my neck, while circling my hips with his. I groan and my stomach begins to tighten again, and when he flicks his hips into mine, I lose it. I scream out his name, almost afraid that someone will hear us.

"W—what was that?" I ask, coming down from my high.

"I'm not sure, but you seem to like it," he answers with the same confusion as me, but with a smirk on his face. With shaky hands, I make my way down his chest, brushing them against his abdomen, and placing them on the buckle of his jeans. I fumble a little before actually getting it unzipped. When I do, he groans and closes his eyes. I take this as a good sign and using my feet to slide them the rest of the way off.

He shutters on top of me and his arms look like they are going to give out. Even though I haven't exactly...touched him, he looks as if I had already satisfied him. He looks into my eyes whilst hooking his thumbs under the band of my grey panties, I kiss him, hard, and then gaze back into his midnight eyes and nod. His hands touch my bare hips, but he keeps eye contact. He gently and agonizingly slowly peels them all the way off. He lifts my leg onto his shoulder and presses a kiss to the inside of my ankle. He works his way down to my previous forbidden area. As he gets closer my moans get louder. I bite my lip to try and stifle my groan when he softly bites down on the inside of my thigh. While his other hand is trailing up and down my other leg. It surprises me when he stops abruptly, but then when I feel his mouth come to the part of me that craves him the most, I push my hips off the ground—which just causes him to pull his hands on them to hold me down—and cry out in pleasure.

I have never experience something to breathtaking and so earth-shattering that my whole body shakes. My eyes fall to the back of my head and I moan. When I finally calm down and can open my eyes again, I see him smirking at me.

"Enjoying the show?" I ask, my face feeling warmer.

"Very much so," he bends down again and plants a kiss on my stomach. His lips graze my skin all the way up until my neck again where he bites, then makes his way to my ear, "You have no idea what you do to me..." he almost growls.

"I want you, Tobias, I need you," I'm breathing hard, so the words come out like a gasp.

"I want you too, Tris," he says while climbing up my body. I look at him I the eye and play with his hair that has grown out a bit.

"So take me," I whisper. He stands on his knees to slide out of his shorts. I had to, I could resist. I look down. I have no idea how...that...is going to fit in me. "How—" Tobias cuts me off.

"Trust me," he kisses my lips again and I can faintly taste myself on his lips. It's not displeasing, just different. He aligns himself to me and I take a deep breathe. I've heard the stories the Candor girls at school have said about losing their virginities. They said the first time can be summed up in one word. Pain. At least for the girl, that is. Tobias must have seen the fear on my face, because he stops and brushes away the hair that has fallen from my ponytail. "Are you sure? You don't have to do this, we can—" this time I'm the one to do the cutting in.

"I'm sure," my voice is tight, but firm. "One-hundred percent." He dips down again and gives me a small peck on my lips. He positions himself against me again. When I feel him enter me slowly, it's almost too slow and I want more, but once again he stops, maybe a quarter of the way in, it's almost like he hit a wall of some sort.

"Tris, this is going to hurt," he presses a kiss to my neck. "I'm sorry," with that he pushes again, and this time pain tears through me, making me hiss and push his chest, telling him to stop.

"_Stop,_" I close my eyes, hoping that the pain is just a figment of my imagination. This isn't what I wanted. I don't like it, not one bit. It takes me a few moments to open my eyes again, I look into Tobias's worried ones. I blink the tears away, and when the pain is slightly more bearable, I nod.

"Tris—" I shake my head, I want to get over this with. He looks deep in thought before nodding as well. He puts his elbows on either side of my head, and turns his face into my neck, murmuring 'I'm sorry' over and over again. He continued to inch closer into me until there was no more of him. He hovers over me with him still inside me, but he doesn't move, and for that I'm grateful. When the pain had died now lightly, I began to enjoy the feeling of him inside me, but I was afraid that if I moved in anyway, the crippling pain would come back. He laid on me until I became brave enough to rock my hips ever so slightly. That was all the signal he needed. He gradually pulls out, and once out, he plunges back in, still being gentle, yet I didn't want gentle.

I move my hips in time with his, it was harder than before and which caused me to gasp. He didn't need my help. His thrusts became more evenly constant and his breaths started to become heavier. The pain was nothing but a memory, and every thrust became more pleasurable. Every few seconds, he increases in speed. A familiar twisting in my stomach starts to form again and my hands caress his muscular back.

"Faster, Tobias," I whimper. He picks up the pace a little, but I feel like he's still holding back, I open my legs as far as they will go and whisper-shout, "Harder." When he's going as fast as he probably go, his thrusts faultier, but then tries to keep going.

"Tris..." he breathes out and licks and sucks my skin until he clamps down on one of my perky breast. He pushes me off the edge.

"Tobias!" I scream and when I do, a warm feeling fills me and he stops in his tracks. Both of us breathing heavily and slick with sweat. We lie there, on the floor, until Tobias pulls out of me and goes to the closet. He pulls out a big grey blanket with some patches sown into it. He lays back down with me and places the blanket over us. We really don't need it, because our shared body heat is warm enough, but I don't reject it. I turn over and press my bare back to his naked chest, his arms weave themselves around my waist. He lets out a deep sigh that tickles the nape of my neck.

"Does it hurt?" his voice is strong and husky while mine fails me. I twist around, so that I can see his face. I bring my hand up to his cheek and rub my thumb across his chin, lips, and temple.

"Not as much as I thought, but yeah, it hurts," I say softly, but immediately after that, his face fills with concern.

"Tris, I'm sorry I didn't mean—"

"But I would do it all over again," I smile. He kiss my forehead, like when we first met, and breathes out again.

"Come on, you should get some rest," I turn back over with a smile on my face. But that smile quickly fades when I remember what tomorrow is. I decide to let reality stay buried for night and enjoy the fact that I'm pressed against his naked body.

When I wake the next morning, my back is cold and it's dead silent in the room. I roll over, sit up, and call out, "Tobias? Tobias, where are you?" When there's no response, I get off the floor, wrapping the blanket around me. I spin in circles, trying to find him. My eyes settle on the target board. On it is a piece of paper with a knife sticking through it. As I get closer, my anxiety get higher. I tear the paper from the wooden plank and my eyes fill with tears.

_Tris, __  
><em>_I'm sorry that I didn't get to wake with you, but I know you need the rest. I'm sorry for hurting you last night and I'm sorry that you have to read this now. Know that I never wanted to leave without you. I love you. I'm in love with you. Ever since the day we met. You stole the rest of my heart, and I'm sorry, but that's all I have. I'll wait for you. Forever and Always.__  
><em>_Goodbye,__  
><em>_Tobias_

Loves me? He left me. Right after...last night. I gave everything to him. I love him. And he was the one to leave. My legs feel weak and before I know I'm on the ground again, sobbing, screaming for him, my body trembles. My chest hurts, like someone—Tobias—tore out a hunk of it. I should have known better than to befriend a boy. Known better than to just go sleeping with anyone. Last night was a mistake. I knew I wasn't ready, but my mind craved to be defiant. It was selfish of me to want that.

After my breakdown and I collect myself, I go off and find my clothes. When I slip into them, it's like putting on a mask. I don't deserve these, or anything.

Since my dad is a council member, our whole family has to come, except Caleb, because he defected about three years ago. He usually comes and visits me every other month or so. I get to the Ceremony late, because I had to run home and wash the smell of Tobias off. But when I get there, Max, the Dauntless head-leader, had just finished his speech about bravery and unity.

I zone out until the first transfer—Candor-born to Erudite. They clap for their new initiate.

"Tobias Eaton," Max calls out and my heart stops. He walks to center of the stage, accepts the knife, and presses the blade to his palm. The blood pools in his hand, and he looks over his shoulder, at me. He mouths 'I'm sorry', then dumps the scarlet blood on the hot coals. The only thing I can hear is the sizzling the rocks make. Something glides down my cheek and lands on my clasped hands. I look down and see that, once again, I'm crying. Not sobbing, just letting the tears fall silently.

After the Ceremony, I tell my parents I need some air, but really I need Tobias. So I go to the place that has the most of him. Climbing down the ladder isn't the same without him. The atmosphere feels...disheartening. I sit down on the mat we made love on, and scream into my hands. I want to hate him, but all I feel is love. How can you hate someone you love? I want him back. But he made his choice, now we both have to live will it.

**A/N: Okay the reason I didn't go all sexual is because keep in mind that she's fourteen and he's sixteen, but was that okay? Wasn't too...I don't know, you guys tell me. Thanks for the reviews, follows, and favorite-ing! Please tell me how I did with the smut. This is an extra-long chapter, so I expect more reviews, please? Thanks again!****Live Long & Prosper**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: Sick**

_Previously..._  
><em>After the Ceremony, I tell my parents I need some air, but really I need Tobias. So I go to the place that has the most of him. Climbing down the ladder isn't the same without him. The atmosphere feels...disheartening. I sit down on the mat we made love on, and scream into my hands. I want to hate him, but all I feel is love. How can you hate someone you love? I want him back. But he made his choice, now we both have to live will it.<em>

The first thing I register in the morning was smell of oatmeal with butter and my stomach is sent off a cliff. I rush into my bathroom and empty my stomach of last night's dinner. After I finish, I sit on the floor, balling my eyes out. It's been two weeks since Tobias left me after our...last night. I still can't believe I went through with it. I mean, I'm fourteen, not particularly pretty, and Abnegation-born. God, why am I so stupid?

I have no idea how long I've sat on the floor, but when I hear footstep coming closer, I quickly stand—which probably wasn't the best idea, considering my splitting ache and nausea—and wiping the tears from my eyes.

"Beatrice, are you alright? May I come in?" My mother softly through the door. I splash some cold water on my swollen, flushed face, hoping that it'll help. I clear my throat.

"Yea, I'm fine, I just think I'm a little under the weather today. And I'm about to take a shower," I call back.

"Okay, sweetheart, breakfast is ready, and your father has left for work."

"Okay, I'll hurry, thanks mom," and with that I hear her footsteps descent downstairs. "What's wrong with me?" I ask myself, while running my hands through my hair.

After a long, steamy shower, I decide to come back to reality. When I walk out of my bathroom, I notice how my feet are more plump than usual. I never get sick. Ever. The last time I think I was sick was when I was four or five and it was the flu. But other than that, I don't recall. After putting on my grey dress—that's a couple sizes to big—and stuffing my feet into my grey boots, I climb down the stairs, where I meet my mother in the kitchen.

"How did you sleep, Beatrice?" she asks, kindly.

"Well," I smile. Actually I didn't sleep at all. The past two weeks I have got maybe only eight hours without a nightmare about Tobias. I think about him all the time. There hasn't been a moment when I don't. I see him everywhere; in my dreams, at school, and sometimes when I'm lucky, I'll see his ghost in the training room. A constant reminder about my mistake that night. My thoughts consume my mind that I don't even hear mom calling my name.

"Honey, are you feeling alright?" she must sense my distance and I don't blame her. I haven't really talked these last few weeks. Maybe a 'hello' or an 'uh' here and there, but today is really the first conversation I've had with her.

"I'm fine, just not feeling good," I try a convincing smile and add, "I'm going to school, love you," I give her a quick hug and head out the door, not bothering with breakfast.

I decide to walk to school today, hoping that the fresh air would help. But as I stroll by the Factionless sector, I get hit with a wave of the foul smell lurking around. I immediately hunch over and spill my guts. Sometime later I feel a small, warm hand rubbing my back, but once I don't recognize the hand, I flinch away.

"I'm sorry to startle you, but it looked like you needed it," I turn and face the female voice. There's an oddly familiar appearance about her. Her nose hooks at the end and her hair is so dark brown it looks black. Her jaw is more squared off and she has a certain way she holds herself. Pride. And for being factionless, that's rare.

"Yeah, thanks," I say, trying to keep my cool.

"You're welcome, can I ask you, why are you vomiting?" Her brows crease together, just like Tobias's did when he was concerned.

"Um, I'm not sure, but I lost somebody, and I guess my body is trying to compromise with my emotions,"

"I'm sorry for your loss, but I have to ask, family or friend?"

"Does it matter? He's gone and there's nothing I can do about it!" I probably shouldn't have told her all of this, but she sent me wild. "I—I—I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..." and I trail off.

"So, a lover?" she asks. I don't know why she's asking all this—and it's starting to get on my nerves, but I feel like I can _trust_ her. I guess my silence answered her because she continues, "Ahh, I used to have one—we even got married and had a son—but that's beside the point. Honey, don't get involved with them, yet."

"And if I've already have," Her facial expression changes from pity to surprise. I guess I would be surprised too if I were her. A teenage Abnegation girl already having self-serving acts with another Abnegation boy. I didn't even realize I was crying until she brought her hand up to wipe them away.

"It only gets worst, Hun," she smile weakly.

"Can I ask you something?" I ask shyly. She nods. "What was he like? Your son?"

"Handsome. Gorgeous blue eyes and brown hair. He had a lot of spirit for someone in Abnegation," she smiles and leads me over a fallen brick, where we sit and I take in a deep breath.

I continue, "How old were you?"

She looks slightly confused at my question, but then answers with some hesitation, "Twenty-five, standard Abnegation age."

"Abnegation? But how are you Factionless?" I stare at her in shock. No one ever leaves Abnegation. Until death do us part. Tobias was the first to transfer in over thirty years.

"Yes, I kind of got in trouble with the government," she looks at her hands, trying to hide the shame that I written all over her face.

"What did you do?" After the words slip out, I feel incredible intrusive. "I'm sorry—I didn't mean to ask—I shouldn't have—" she cuts me off.

"No, no, no! It's fine, it's just, I don't like to talk about it." We stay silent until she breaks the ice again. "Can I ask you something?" I cautiously nod and she goes on. "Why are you sick?"

"I think I eat something bad early," I say robotically.

"You mentioned a lover? Did you..." she huffs. "Were you guys...intimate?" Her question takes me by surprise and I gasp.

"Absolutely not! No! I would never do that at this age or time or whatever..." and I trail off, finding myself sounding way too defensive.

"Hun, have you missed anything?" Missed anything? What is she talking about? "You know...like womanly things..." What? "The thing you get every month..." What the hell? Why is she asking...

"Why are you asking me this?"

"Because when I first got...pregnant...everything I smelt made my stomach flip," Pregnant? Who said anything about this? I completely and utterly confused by this strange woman.

"I'm sorry, but what are you even talking about?" I ask, trying to keep my voice from shouting.

"Well, Hun, I think you're pregnant."

**A/N: Dun Dun da! Sorry this was a small filler chapter and a sucky one at that, but I promise next the next chapter with be longer and better :( Question of the day: Who do you think the Factionless woman was? Thanks for all you kind reviews, follows, and favorites! You guys are the best! Okay, since Thanksgiving is coming up this Thursday, I might not have time to update this upcoming Sunday, so I'm going to post chapter 8 Wednesday night, but I won't be able to update again until December 7. Sorry for the inconvenience, but I too want to spend time with my family.**

**Live Long & Prosper**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: Doctors**  
><em><br>__Previously...__  
><em>_"I'm sorry, but what are you even talking about?" I ask, trying to keep my voice from shouting. ___

_"Well, Hun, I think you're pregnant."_

I take off sprinting. There is no way I'm pregnant. I can't be. But I don't know. Even though I her the woman call out to me, I don't stop. I run hard a fast back to the training room. If I go home, then my mother will be there. And I most defiantly will not go to school with a tear-stained face.

With shaky hands, I open the hatch door and climb down the ladder in record time. But when I get into the middle of the room, my knees give out and my face is slick tears. I sob uncontrollable into the palms of my hands. When I finally get the strength to get up, I walk over an pull on my Dauntless training uniform. I need to find out if that lady was right, but I'm so scared.

By the time I exit the training room, it's near noon. I jog passed to broken down buildings, until I come across the train tracks. When Tobias was teaching me how to get on and off a moving train, he also had me memorize the train's schedule. Those were the easy days, besides the first day when I sprained my ankle hoping off.

I'm so caught up in my thoughts, that when the train flies down the path, it startles me. My feet act instinctively and start building speed, my arms swinging in sync with my legs. When the last car starts to come into view, I throw my weight sideways while taking one massive leap. My foot steps on the ledge and I swing myself inside. My heart is pounding against my chest, I'm afraid that it'll burst.

Once my mind is settle and my body isn't shaking as much, I take a deep breath and stand. The only way I'll know for sure that the Factionless woman was telling me the truth is if I go to Erudite. They are the brains of this city, so they must know what's happening to me.

When the reflection of the big glass building come into view, I shake my legs out and prepare for the landing. As I get closer, my anxiety gets higher. Once my feet step out of this train, I have to act Dauntless, live up to my _costume_. I thought it would be better to go to Erudite wearing black instead of grey so I don't stick out as much. Of course people will stare at me, but if I were in Abnegation grey then probably Caleb would recognize me and he would find out and things would just get worst. I shake out my bun, and the loose waves hang to my sides.

As I walk up the hospital, my stomach takes a leap and I empty my stomach for the third time today. I don't where all this is coming from. I mean, I ate my small dinner and skipped breakfast, so how is this even possible?

Walking up to the woman at the front desk is hard, but getting the words out is even more difficult. I stand there, my mouth open, having no idea what to say or how to say it. When the lady sitting behind the desk see me, she slightly tilts her glasses down so she can see my face. Her blonde hair is in a tight bun and her makeup is light. She has beautiful eyes, celery-like.

"Can I help you?" Her voice smooth and soft.

"Um, yeah I need to get an appointment for today," I twiddle with my fingers.

"Oh, of course, for what sector?" Her eyes darting from mine to her computer screen.

"Um—th—the pre—pregna—pregnancy facility," I stutter, on the verge of tears again.

"Oh my, absolutely, right this way," she stands and walks down a narrow hallway. She holds a door open for me, through it, a light so bright that it blinds me. We walk through, the first thing I see is a chair that looks like a dentist chair with a large screen next to it. Next to the screen is a wand looking object that is connected to the screen. "Please sit. And my name is Cara."

My legs shake like crazy, and it's incredibly hard to actually get onto the seat. When I do finally get on top, I fiddle with hands, until Cara places her hands over mine.

"It's going to be okay. Now, I need you to answer some questions," she asks and I nod. "How old are you?"

"Going to be fifteen soon," my voice sounds weak and frail.

"When was your last cycle?"

My face burns, but I answer anyways, "About four weeks ago."

"When was the last time you had intercourse?"

"About two weeks ago..." I look down, trying to hide my inflamed cheeks.

"Okay, I'm going to look inside your uterus. Nothing painful or harmful," she gives me a tight smile. I nod. "Can you lift your shirt?" I comply. "This is going to be cold," she tries a light giggle. She squirts a jelly like substance on my pale stomach, its cold, but my whole body is on fire. She turns on the monitor and brings the wand down to my abdomen—which has gotten softer since Tobias has left—and massages in the gel.

"Let's see what's happening with your life," her tone is nervous and almost scared. Pretty soon the screen stars to beep and it lights up. She moves the wand lower and pulls it to the right. "I'm so sorry, but you're pregnant," her eyes are pitiful.

Time has stopped. Pregnant. My baby. Tobias's and mine. Apart of him, a part of me. My eyes fill to the brim with tears.

"How far along?" My voice cracks.

"A week...I'll leave you to let you think," she turns, but then whips back around and says, "You know, you don't have to so this, there are options."

"You mean, kill my baby? Destroy something I created out of love? I mean, I didn't mean to, but it happened and now I'm responsible for him or her," I clarify, clearly annoyed at her for even suggesting an abortion.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to anger you," she apologizes.

"No, I'm sorry, you were just trying to help me, and I guess I'm just hormonal."

"It's absolutely understandable, let me get you a schedule for your next few appointments, make sure you don't do any extreme physical activity or land on your stomach and get at least eight hours of sleep each night. We will see you here in a month," Cara hands me a paper. I glance at the paperwork and see that every month I have a check-up.

I go through the motions. Walk throughout the compound, one foot in front of the other, keeping my eyes trained onto the floor, until I stumble upon the tracks again. It's just passed two in the afternoon so that means I have an hour to change cloths, walk home, and make dinner.

When the train zooms by, my feet take off. I try extra hard not to land on my mid-section. Once the train nears the Factionless sector, and I jump out of the car, landing in a summersault, and walk down the pathway. But when I reach the warehouse, my whole body feels limp and I crash down right outside, balling my eyes out.

"Damn it! How could he be so stupid! He ruined my life! Our baby's life! Why was I so ignorant to go along? Why?" I scream, repeatedly. By the time I'm done with my breakdown, my back is pressed up against the building behind me, my clenched fists were so tight, that blood is now dripping into the gravel in front of me, and I think I have make myself physical sick from all the crying I have done. My body shakes back and forth and my hands sting, some of the blood landing on my black clothing. I crawl down into the training room, trade my black vest and jeans for my regular grey slacks. I gently rub away the dried blood off my hands and put some healing cream on. Tobias and I used to use a tube of it a week, so that way no one could see the bruises we accidentally gave each other. I splash some cold water on my face to calm my swollen eyes and flushed cheeks.

I get home ten minutes late because I overestimated my time in Erudite, but luckily my parents aren't home yet. I make the usual; chicken, green beans, and plain bread. I haven't eaten since yesterday's dinner and I pretty much puked it all up during the day, so when I start to smell the chicken cooking, my stomach growls. My parents are late again, so I decide to eat without them and place their plates in the cooler for later.

Once I get done with my dinner—I ate a little more than usual because of the baby currently growing within me—and got ready for bed, my parents finally decide to come home. I lie in bed, waiting for the sleep to consume me, but it never comes. When the clock by my side says a quarter passed eight, my mother lightly knocks on my door, making me rise from my mattress.

"Are you awake, Beatrice?" Her tired voice asks.

"Yes, do you want to come in?" I yawn. She switches on the light, which causes me to cover my eyes with my hand. She sits on my bed, which cause the bed to tilt and make me roll slightly.

"Honey, what's wrong," she brushes my fallen hair away from my face.

"What do you mean?" I try to keep my voice even and firm, but instead it comes out like a gasp.

"You've been really...depressed since the Choosing Ceremony, you've barely have eaten anything, plus you don't talk with me as much as you used too, so I'll ask again; what is wrong, Beatrice?" Her tone is soft while still firm and authoritative. I know it's not use lying to her, but how can I tell her, when I can't even speak right now.

"Mommy!" I breakdown in a mess of tears and harsh breaths. I haven't called my mother 'mommy' since I was three. My heart aches because now I have to tell her what no mother would ever want to hear from their fourteen year old daughter. "I—I'm h—hav—having a b—baby," my fists enclose themselves into her dress, shutting my eyes as tight as they can go. "I'm having a baby," I whisper over and over again to her chest. By now, I'm curled up on her lap, making a huge wet stain on her shoulder.

"Shh, honey, it's going to be okay, everything's going to be okay," she hums a song she used to sing to Caleb and I as children. "Beatrice, can I ask you a serious question?" her lip quivers. I merely nod and she continues, "Was it forced?"

"No, mommy, I agreed, I stupidly agreed to ruin my life!" my cries become louder and harsher.

"Sweetheart, babies don't ruin your life, maybe this is bad timing, but your baby is supposed to be here, within you, now, it's your responsibly to nourish, care for, and love that baby. Babies are a blessing wrap in a cursed world," she sides her hand down to my stomach. "I already love this baby, I know you love this baby, and now, you just have to accept it."

"I don't know if I can do this," my body trembles.

"You can, I believe in you and support you," she finishes with a hug to prove her point. I hug her back with as much love and gratitude as I have. She's right. This is my baby. Now that I have accepted the fact that I have a human-being growing inside me, I know that my life will never be the same.

**A/N: And there you have chapter 8! I hope you guys enjoyed it! Now stop reading, and go spend time with your families and stuff your faces with some delicious turkey! But before you go, please review! Now the voting begins: boy; Myles or Heath, girl; Clementine or Bayley. Hope you guys have an amazing Thanksgiving and week! Until December 7...******

**Live Long & Prosper**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: Unexpected Becomes the Expecting **

**A/N: I'm back! Okay, a couple of you were asking if I'm going to write about Tris's pregnancy, and yes, I am. First reason because I haven't read anything like it and second because this entire fandom is from Tris's point of view. But I will admit, I have never been pregnant and/or plan to get pregnant in the next five years, all I'm going off is what I research, my sister's pregnancy last year, and movies/TV shows. So if there are mothers reading this, and I get something wrong, I apologize in advance. As for the Divergent world, since they are in the future, I may have their technology far more accurate. Now, back to the story...**

_Previously...__  
><em>_"I don't know if I can do this," my body trembles. __"You can, I believe in you and support you," she finishes with a hug to prove her point. I hug her back with as much love and gratitude as I have. She's right. This is my baby. Now that I have accepted the fact that I have a human-being growing inside me, I know that my life will never be the same. __  
><em>  
>"Well, the baby looks very healthy and so do you," Cara says while taking the wand off my stomach and shutting the monitor off. It's my first monthly check-up and this time I brought my mother with me.<br>**  
><strong>_**Four weeks ago...**__"Honey, how did you even meet a boy?" she asks, while running her fingers through my hair. __"Well, about two years—" she cuts my off. __"Two years? How in the world did you keep such a secret?"__"He made me promise I wouldn't tell anyone, anyways, I was trying to help him, and we just sort of, clicked. He asked me if I—please don't be mad at me, but he asked me if I wanted to train like the Dauntless," I pause, letting her take it all in. __"Why, sweetheart?" she says finally. __"Because...I have never felt like Abnegation was for me, I wanted to try something else and do something $for$ myself—I know that is selfish, but I'm not selfless enough to be here," I admit with tears filling my eyes. __"You don't think I've noticed," she laughs, but I just keep my serious face on and she continues, "Honey, nobody cannot think of themselves, some are just better at hiding it." __"Are you going to tell dad?" My voice pleading. __"No, there's no need to," she kiss my hair line. She stays with me through the night and holds my tighter when I cry._  
><em><strong><br>**__**Present day...**_

Mom squeeze my hand reassuringly and gives me a tight smile and a slight nod.

"When can we find out if its a girl or boy?" My mother speaks up. When I look at her, she doesn't look like the mother who raised me. A black shirt that hugs her torso and legging that show off how much she walks, even her hair is down. She has always been a beautiful woman, even when she's buried under mountains of grey, but now, in black, she looks as if she's ten years younger.

"In about ten weeks, Mrs. Wright," she smiles. We used my mother's maiden last name, so that my father or brother or faction won't find out about me. "Are you thinking of having the baby here or in Amity?" Cara asks.

"Um, well, I was thinking Amity—just because it's more discrete..." I reply, shyly.

"Oh, okay, well I think we are done here," she smiles and hands me a shiny, square of paper. When I look at it closely, I see a small dot. My baby. It's so tiny and innocent. My eyes burn again and I stifle a cry. Nerves, fear, and excitement replace my blood. "See you in a month, Tris," Cara leaves my mother and I.

I'm surprised at how easily my mother got the car from my father. The drive home is silent, the gentle purr of the engine is the sound. When we pull into our driveway I find it hard to believe that in eight short months, I'll be bringing a newborn here.

I find it even more difficult to believe when I see Uri and Chris on my front steps. I look to my mother, quietly asking if it's okay for them to be here. She smiles and weakly laughs. I hop out and speed walk up the concrete path.

"Long time know see," Uri days in his lighthearted voice, while Christina's is blunt and serious.

"Yeah, really, I thought it was _selfish_ to skip school," she raises an eyebrow.

"You guys, I just saw you the other day," I say, confused.

"That doesn't matter, I still miss my favorite _Stiff_," Uriah jokes and slings his arm across my shoulders. I stare at him in shock, not just because he touched me in public, but because he did it in front of my mother. I clear my throat and dart my eyes from his to his arm. He looks confused for a moment before rounding his mouth into an 'o' shape and letting his arm fall.

"Um, um, mom, this is Uriah and Christina, Uriah's from Dauntless and Christina is from Candor," I say awkwardly. She looks at me and Uriah for a second before her eyes travel down to my stomach. _Oh, oh hell no!_ I think. I shake my head vigorously. She sighs and lifts her hand out to them.

"Hello, I'm Natalie, it's every nice to finally meet you, Beatrice talks about you all the time," she introduces herself politely. I catch how she said, _Beatrice talks about you all the time_, when I have never even brought up the fact that my P.F class is full of Dauntless.

"Greetings Mrs. Prior, as Beatrice said, I'm Uriah—but most people just call my Uri," He explains in horrible accent while shaking my mother's hand.

"You can just call me Chris," Christina says, also greeting her.

"Well, Honey, I'm going to start dinner, will you guys be joining us?" My mother asks.

"Nah, I got a family thingy tonight, so I have to get going so, but thanks for the invite," Uri says. I lead them up stairs into my bedroom where Chris's jaw drops.

"You—you have no—o color," she stutters in shock. I guess I never took into consideration about how my room was all grey. Not even a family photo.

"Sorry to disappoint you, Chris," I giggle. "So...why are you guys here?"

"Oh! Because Chris was saying how you've been acting strange," Uri answers while looking over my bed before jumping into the air and landing face first on the solid mattress.

"Uri! You are going to break something!" I scream.

"Sorry, it looked softer that I thought," he says while rubbing his bright red cheek.

"Guys! We're getting sidetracked! Tris, just answer us," Chris scolds us.

I take off my jacket and sling it over my bed frame, but something falls out of the front pocket. A piece of paper. A _shiny_ piece of paper. The picture, the picture of my baby. I try to grab it, but Chris beats me to it.

She stares at it intently, glazing between me, my abdomen, and the ultrasound, like she's just solved the world biggest mystery. My eyes begin to fill with tears and before I can explain myself, she throws her arms around my shoulders. I stand there, stunned for a second before tightening my arms around her mid-section. We cry together, I know why I'm crying, but why is she?

"Why are you crying, Chris?" I ask when I find my voice.

"Because...I guess I'm excited for you, but terrified as well," she wipe under her eyes. I smile at her. There's a loud cough—I completely forgot Uri is standing less than five feet away.

"Why are you guys crying and hugging and being...well weird?" he gazes at us.

"Uri, I'm having a baby," I whisper. He looks shocked, but then the biggest grin I have even seen spreads across his face.

"I'm going to be an uncle!" he shouts. I laugh and then realize how loud he was.

"Uri! Can you like...not tell the whole world?" I tease him, but it doesn't seem to faze him because he picks me up and twirls like a little boy. I giggle and say:

"You guys really okay with this?"

"Like Uri said, I'm going to be an aunt!" Chris exclaims. I'm so happy to have friends that are my family.  
><strong><br>****A/N: Sorry for this horrible, suck ass update :( I feel like I let you guys down...but hey, I updated this weekend! I wasn't planning to, but I finished and thought you guys earned it...11 reviews on my last chapter! You guys are fucking A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! I love you guys and really appreciate your guy's comments! Once again please vote on the names: boy; Myles or Heath, girl; Clementine or Bayley. And I forgot to mention that you guys can also throw in some of your own names! Until next week...****Live Long & Prosper**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10: Lies Take Their Toll ******

**(Tris's is now eight weeks)******

_Previously...__  
><em>_"You guys really okay with this?" ___

_"Like Uri said, I'm going to be an aunt!" Chris exclaims. I'm so happy to have friends that are my family. ___

I notice, when I'm naked that my abdomen is swollen and my breast have pretty much double in size. My small frame is really not helping that fact. I huff, climbing into my concrete shower. When I was younger, my mother used to sing to me when she was putting me to bed. They were little melodies that she sung in a low voice that always managed to sound high. So, I start to hum.

Singing to myself would be self-indulgent, but singing for a child is a sign of love, caring. I keep my voice low so that my father won't hear, but loud enough that I can hear myself.

"_I was a little girl __  
><em>_Alone in my little world __  
><em>_Who dreamed of a little home for me.__  
><em>_I played pretend between the trees, __  
><em>_And fed my houseguests bark and leaves, __  
><em>_And laughed in my pretty bed of green.___

_I had a dream__  
><em>_That I could fly __  
><em>_From the highest swing.__  
><em>_I had a dream.___

_Long walks in the dark __  
><em>_Through woods grown behind the park, __  
><em>_I asked God who I'm supposed to be.__  
><em>_The stars smiled down on me, __  
><em>_God answered in silent reverie. __  
><em>_I said a prayer and fell asleep.___

_I had a dream__  
><em>_That I could fly __  
><em>_From the highest tree.__  
><em>_I had a dream___

_Now I'm old and feeling grey. __  
><em>_I don't know what's left to say __  
><em>_About this life I'm willing to leave.__  
><em>_I lived it full and I lived it well, __  
><em>_There's many tales I've lived to tell. __  
><em>_I'm ready now, __  
><em>_I'm ready now,__  
><em>_I'm ready now __  
><em>_To fly from the highest wing.___

_I had a dream," _as I finish the song, I turn the water off and wrap a towel around my swollen tummy. Since my parents are at a seminar in Amity, I have the whole house to myself. I decide to just wear a tight dark grey tank-top and some loose fitted grey cotton shorts. I throw my hair up into a messy ponytail and take a nap. With the stress of the pregnancy getting to me, I think it's best.

When I wake, I can sense I'm not alone. There is a crash in the kitchen that almost makes me soil my pants. I silently rip the covers off me, grabbing the fireplace skewer, making my way to the sound. I turn the corner, hoping to get a view of the intruder. But all I see is blue. A man I dark blue dress pants and an aqua blue over coat. Not the best matching idea, but that's note point. I need to be brave.

"Whoever you are, get out! I know how to fight and then call Dauntless!" I yell hoping to scare him off. But then there's a familiar laugh.

"Beatrice, it's just me, you know your brother, Caleb," he calls back and I nearly drop the skewer on my bare foot.

"Caleb? Caleb!" I cheer. I know I'm barely clothed right now, but I haven't seen Caleb in weeks. Jumping into his arms feels like when we were kids. When he was still here and I wasn't pregnant. "Why are you here? Why didn't you tell me? Do you know how bad you scared—"

"Bea, slow down! One question at a time," he says with a smile.

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" I say loosening my hold around his shoulders. He opens his mouth, but when his eyes fall to my stomach, his face turns white and his eyes widen. I forgot that he doesn't know about the pregnancy.

"Who? What? Where? When? H—how?" he sputters. His face turns a crimson red, but not like embarrassed, furious. "Don't answer how, I know," he shakes his head. "Who?" he asks in a deadly manner.

"Caleb, please don't be angry, this wasn't supposed to happen. It was an accident," I say, trying to calm him down.

"I asked, who?" he looks into my eyes.

"Someone I thought I loved and I thought who loved me," I croak.

"Damn it, Beatrice!" he yells. "How could you be so stupid! You are thirteen!"

"Fourteen," I correct him.

"I don't care about that! You ate still my _baby_ sister!" he paces in front of me, muttering, running his fingers through his hair. "Why?"

"Why, what?" I spit, tears spilling over. I knew he would be mad, but this isn't the brother who held my hand when out mother broke her wrist. This isn't the brother who said he'd come home every month. No, this is an entirely different side of him.

"Why did you go through with it?" his eyes filling with his own tears.

"He was leaving. I thought he loved me," a sob erupts from my mouth and Caleb's arms snake their way around my shoulders. "I'm sorry," my knees buckle, I start to fall, but my brother's arms tighten and lift me back up.

"Shh, it's okay, I'm sorry I yelled at you, Bea, is just, I love you and I don't like seeing you get hurt," he coos.

"I'm sorry to have disappointed you, Caleb."

"No, I left when I should have stayed. You were too young to have your only sibling leave. And I'm so sorry, I should have seen it," he hugs me.

We stay up until our parents get home. Caleb and I make dinner together like old times and we sit as a whole family again. And just for now, I forget all about my stresses.

**A/N: Ooooo! Caleb now knows! Is he going to tell Andrew? Probably not, but just to spook you guys! The song is **_**Dream by Priscilla Ahn.**_** Anyways, that's for all your awesome reviews! So because Christmas is coming up I WILL NOT be able to update that week. I will however update next week and the following week AFTER the holidays. After that, everything should go back to normal. Thanks again for your comments! Keep on voting on the baby's gender/name! You guys only have like...two more weeks until Tris's doctor appointment to see the gender! ******

**Live Long & Prosper**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: Rumors and Bullies******

****Important Author's note at the end. PLEASE READ! ** ******

**(Twelve Weeks Along)****  
><strong>  
><em>Previously...<em>_  
><em>_"No, I left when I should have stayed. You were too young to have your only sibling leave. And I'm so sorry, I should have seen it," he hugs me. ___

_We stay up until our parents get home. Caleb and I make dinner together like old times and we sit as a whole family again. And just for now, I forget all about my stresses. ___

"Well, Ms. Wright, you are good to go and in a few weeks, I can tell you the sex of the baby," Cara happily says. But there is nothing happy about this pregnancy. Morning sickness is disgusting, I have to wear extra slacks to hide the bump, and I have to pee every twenty minutes. And I think people are starting to wonder what I have to hide. At three months, I can already tell the baby is going to have Tobias's long structure. My breasts are starting to get bigger and sorer, and there's nothing I can do about it.

" ?" Cara snaps me out of my haze. "Did you hear me?" her brows knit together.

"Say again," I answer polity. Christina has being telling me that politeness is deception wrapped in pretty packaging. Or so her mother says. When we are at school, and people look at us like we are crazy, Christina, being open and everything tells them to _fuck off or go mine their own business_. She has been an amazing friend and sister I never had. Uri is the same way. I like to say he is my brother from another mother.

"I said, do you even what to know what the baby is?" her voice moves like honey, soft and careful, but talking about my baby's future is a sticky subject.

"Um, yes, I think so," I reply surely.

"Tris, are you thinking about giving up the baby?" she asks softly but firmly.

"I don't know, Cara, I don't know anything anymore."

"If I were you, I wouldn't. Even though this baby was unintentional, it's still here. That baby was meant to be a part of your life, if you like it or not." Her eyes stay trained to mine—which are filling with tears. I know I wasn't supposed to get pregnant yet, hell I wasn't even supposed to be talking with any males outside my family.

"I'm scared, Cara, what if I'm not good enough for the baby? What if he or she hates me for creating it? I don't have a lot of support these days, and what if the father doesn't want him or her?" I hadn't realize I was crying again until Cara pulled me into a hug and shushing me.

"Those are some pretty big ifs, Tris. No matter what you do I'll support you—I think we have become more than just a doctor-patient relationship, I consider you a close friend," her eyes are now lined with tears of her own. I have never seen Cara cry before, and she has always been beautiful, but now, letting the tears fall silently, she looks even more gorgeous. I envy her. I have never been pretty or ugly. It's just...me. Plain, dull blonde hair, empty grey eyes, line-thin pale lips. Cara is just the opposite of me; bright golden locks, piercing green eyes, plush, soft pink lips. Guys are all over her in the nursery, even though their wives just had a baby. Boys never look at me. To them, I'm just a little girl. But sometimes I wonder why did Tobias even look at me?

"I have to go—family thing, I'll see you next week?" she pushes the tears away with her thumb. I weakly nod. After our good-byes, I walk down the hallway that has a big nursery, full of newborns in dark and light blue fleece blankets. The glass between the babies and the outside world is thick. Like the doctors don't trust us to be responsible enough with them. And maybe we aren't. I mean I got knocked up at fourteen. Maybe for Dauntless that is okay, but Abnegation...that is a different story. The youngest mother I have heard there was eighteen, and that is because she was assaulted by a Factionless man. Plus that was over thirty years ago. They are going to be so disgusted with me. My baby will be put through so much before its first birthday. I look down at my own stomach. Less than six months my baby will be behind that glass window and I'll probably be the only one behind it. The black leather vest covering my torso is getting snug and I can barely zip up the jeans. Sighing, I put my hand on my abdomen.

"I will love you...forever and always," I say to the little human-being inside me. All a sudden there's a clapping sound and I turn abruptly. Peter stands a few meters away from me, still clapping—only I can't hear over the ringing in my ears—with a malicious smirk plastered across his face. He wearing a black button up with white dress pants. His hair tousled in every direction it looks as if he slept in a chair.

"I have to say," Peter whispers as he closes in on me, sucking the oxygen from my lungs, "I didn't see that coming," and he laughs. I knew he was a sadistic bastard from the first day I met him. Always trying to one-up someone else, even if it was a lie, always criticizing other people, picking fights and blaming it on the other person. And of course they believed him because he is Candor. No he is a straight up lying son of a bitch. My throat is tight, but when I get my voice back the only thing I can manage is:

"What do you want?"

He makes a warning sound and shakes his head, "I wouldn't give me any sass if I were you, consider now I know your big secret..._mama_," he mocks me.

"It's a good thing you are not me then," I say, my bravery coming back to me.

"Wow, who knew an Abnegation could be such a bitch," he sneers.

"Like I said, Peter, what do you want?" My patience is running low and all I want to do is run away. He won't forget this and he will probably tell my entire school that I'm a slut that got pregnant.

"Mmmm, maybe for you to stop messing with me."

"Messing with you? I have never ever once tried to taunt you or anything, if at all you are the one messing with me," I spit the word at him. If he thinks I'm messing with him, then what the hell is he doing to me? I have to live with him and his little stick up, lying Candor scum bags for years. I have done nothing, but tried to show them I'm no threat yet they treat my wrong that a dog.

"Well, you just being alive is sickening to me, and now you are going to bring another you into this world, God help me now!" he laughs.

"If it's such a problem, then don't talk to me," I say, trying to keep my voice from quivering.

"But now, I actually have a reason to call you a whore, how many guys have you had to pay to sleep with you? And now you are google to raise that bastard child—" I did not realize I smacked him with the back of my hand until his face was bright red and my hand is stinging. My rage was over boiling.

"Don't you dare call my child a fucking bastard!" I shout at him, now calling attention.

"B-A-S-T-A-R-D—" when he finishes the last letter, I pounce of him. I notice that ever since Tobias has been gone, I've gotten weaker and slower, but I still manage to get a few good punches to his face before I'm ripped away.

"Stop! Stop!" someone yells. I'm kicking and screaming. Yelling at Peter to get the hell away from me and my baby. I feel a deep ache spread throughout my neck before my body goes limp and I fall into a comforting darkness.

"is—ris—Tris, wake up," a soft voice coaxes me back. "I know you're awake, just open your eyes," the voice speaks again. My eyelids feel glued shut and my throat feel like it's been scrubbed raw. All that comes out of me is a strangle whimper.

"Get...water...now," are the only words I can make out before a cool hard rim meets my lips and my throat is immediately relived when the contents spill out. I chug it. When I tip the glass back and there's nothing left, I clear my throat and pry my eyes open.

The room is bright white with a view of the fence. I look around to find Cara and my mother sitting beside me.

"Mom?" it comes out like a gasp.

"Sweetheart, you are play and so is that baby, honey, why did you hurt that young man?" my mother asks.

"Good, and that is no young man, that is Peter Hayes, the biggest asshole out there, mama, he called my baby a bastard," I start to cry again. She climbs into the bed with me, letting me soak her shirt again. When I come around again, my headache is gone and so is Cara. "I want to go home," I say to my mother.

"Alright, they discharged you about an hour ago, so let's get going," she says softly.

During the trip home, no one speaks or moves. Just the slight buzz of the engine. My mom keeps throwing me worried glances and opens her mouth to talk but nothing comes out. It's just past four when we get home, that leaves us an hour before my father gets here.

"I'm going to start on dinner, why don't you go wash up," mom says lightly. I nod and head up stairs. I thought I was big last month, this baby is leaving red scars up and down my stomach. I peel the black clothing off and sulk into the shower. When I feel clean enough, and the shower water has gone cold, I paddle into my bedroom. I throw on a grey tank top, long sleeve undershirt, t-shirt, and a darker grey cardigan. Nothing I do is hiding the fact that I'm getting thicker in the middle.

I can smell the chicken and dinner rolls all the way from the kitchen to my room. My mouth begins to fill with saliva, and I realize I didn't eat lunch. My mother is now feeding me an 'early dinner' since the baby because Abnegation only allows us small portions. I eat quietly as my mother prepares more food for us before my father gets home.

During family dinner my father goes on a rant about Erudite. How they are spreading false rumors and lies. Saying that Abnegation is hoarding all the food and supplies that this city needs. Their leader, Jeanine Matthews, is lying dog. I've seen her a couple times in the baby sector. Though I'm not really sure why she is there. I don't trust her.

I toss and turn all night. Well, at least it feels like all night, but I look at the little digital clock next to me on the night table, it reads eleven. I huff in annoyance and grab a light sweatshirt. Outside is beautiful. I can hear the Factionless roaming around, the thrill screams of Dauntless doing crazy thing, the sound of light, soft music playing in the background, arguments trying to be settled, a miniature explosion happening within a lab, and silence.

_Everything has a purpose for happening_, as my mother said, _life will only give you what it thinks you can handle._ If life thinks this baby will be okay with me, then let it be. My mother has also said, _every action has a reaction_. Cause and effect. This baby is the effect of Tobias and I meeting.

**A/N: Hey guys, long week and I have had absolutely no tome to write. Plus I have had writers block since like Tuesday. And that really sucks. Anyways, thank you guys for being an awesome support! I really did not think my last chapter deserved so many reviews, but I really truly appreciate your guy's comments and support! Because next week is Christmas I will not be able to update next Sunday due to traveling around for the holidays. So Merry Christmas and have a fantastic week! Oh! And this is the last chapter you guys will be able to vote on the gender of the baby because—drum roll please—next chapter will be the reveal! Because I will not be updating next week here is a small preview to chapter 12!******

_**I can see its tiny outline, like a little person curled into a ball, fists clenched, eyes locked shut, and nothing can penetrate it. The heart is the strongest organ a human body has, but hearing its soft heartbeat, like a butterfly's wings flapping, so naïve, and everything is new. The past months have been worth it. Because now, now I know I will be a good mother, and I know what to do. **__****_

_**"Do you want to know the sex?" Cara asks, moving the wand around my swollen abdomen. I have waited ever since I found out I was pregnant to know. Will it be tall, dark, and out of this world gorgeous like its father or plain and ordinary like me? One way to find out. **__****_

_**"Yes."**_


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: Baby Blue or Pink****  
><strong>_  
><em>_(Twenty Weeks Along)_

_Previously...__  
><em>_Outside is beautiful. I can hear the Factionless roaming around, the thrill screams of Dauntless doing crazy thing, the sound of light, soft music playing in the background, arguments trying to be settled, a miniature explosion happening within a lab, and silence._

_Everything has a purpose for happening, as my mother said, life will only give you what it thinks you can handle. If life thinks this baby will be okay with me, then let it be. My mother has also said, every action has a reaction. Cause and effect. This baby is the effect of Tobias and I meeting_.

I don't know how much longer I can hide my baby. Kids at school are already giving me glares and even the teachers stare at me. I've always been quiet, but now it's like I'm the most known girl in school. I just keep head down and my eyes trained to the ground. Candor students are the worst—excluding Christina—they have no filter. Some boys ask why they didn't get any, and the girls call me a whore or a slut. Whatever comes first, and the teachers do nothing to stop them. I don't even care anymore.

My mother always comforts me at night. Murmuring things like 'that's not true' or 'don't listen to a word they say', neither help. I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm pregnant. Everyone expect my father. Even Marcus knows, but he doesn't know it's me or that Tobias is the father. It a rumor. A sixteen year old Abnegation girl is pregnant and nobody knows who the baby's daddy is. Like a ghost, I sulk to my next class. My P.F teacher, Amar, is the only kind one to me. Which is surprising being that he is Dauntless. He has excused me from all physical exercises. Sometimes I wonder if he knows Tobias or is even friends with him.

"Beatrice, will you give me a hand here?" Amar breaks my train of thought, he holds up a wooden board with our names on it. Mile run. I slowly walked over to him, quietly passing Peter and his friends, but as I kept walking, I hear Molly scoff.

"Whore," she coughed, looking at me innocently.

"If you are going to say something, than say it to my face, not my back," I snap. My hormones getting the best of me.

She turns and looks at me, "You filthy whore, your bastard kid is such a humiliation." Her eyes ran over my body disgustedly, "Who would even fuck you?"

"I could say the same to you, as for my child," I inhale and sock her square in the jaw before I exhale, "Stay the hell away from me and my baby." I continue towards Amar, and he starts to slowly clap.

"Nicely done," he says when I fully approach him. I take a slight bow and grin.

"What was it that you wanted my help with?" I question.

"Could you hold this up," he gestures to the wooden board, "while I hammer in a nail."

"Sure," I say, grabbing the board's frame and lift it up. But as I lift, something glides inside me. I gasp and drop the board, my hand immediately fly to my swollen stomach. I feel it again.

"Beatrice, is everything okay?" Amar asks when he see I'm no longer holding the board. I nod vigorously and reach out for his hand. I place it where I felt the last movement. He seems confused until the baby kicks me from the inside. His eyes light up and we share the biggest smile.

"Chris! Uri! Come quick!" Amar yells to the other side if the room. Everyone stares at me. Chris beats Uri by a second with a blonde headed boy in tow.

"What? Is something wrong? Tris—" I cut her off my grabbing her hand and moving it around on my abdomen. When she gasps and presses down, I let go of her hand. "Holy shit! Holy _fucking_ shit!" she screams other profanities, her eyes wild with excitement.

"Chris, move over, let me feel!" Uri exclaims. His big hands cover most of the right side of my tummy, I look up and see one of the biggest grin spread a crossed his lips.

The blonde boy with Chris also has smile. He has celery eyes—like Cara's only the left iris is slightly lighter. He has a long narrow nose and a lengthy build. His body is covered, from head to toe, in blue.

"Hello, I'm Beatrice, but most people call me Tris," I introduce myself.

"Will," the blonde boy, Will, sticks his hand out. I take it lightly and shake it. He seems a little surprised at my physical touch, but then again, I'm pregnant. "It's very nice to meet you, Chris talks about you all the time."

"She does?" I look at her for an explanation on why I haven't heard a single word about this boy.

"All the time, well, at least when I'm with her," he laughs.

I smile, "Any chance you are related to a Cara?"

"Yeah! I was going to ask you, but I didn't know how to," he blushes from embarrassment. Chris laughs at him and I gently hit her in the arm, scolding her.

The rest of school goes by with more stares, whispers, and giggles from other people. I told my Dad that I was volunteering this afternoon, but really I have an appointment with Cara. I'm twenty weeks along and I can finally know the gender of my baby. I won't have to call it 'baby' anymore. But on the same note, now I have to start thinking about names and who's going to watch him or her when I go to school. And most importantly, my Dad. When is he going to pick up on the fact that his teenage daughter is already half way through her pregnancy?

I can't take the train anymore because of this baby either, so I'm forced to ride the bus. Mom is at a business meeting with Dad to discuss something to do with the Factionless, and I can't just take their car either.

I exchanged my skinny jeans and vest for some black legging and a dark grey tank top under a black cardigan, since the crisp winter air is still here. When I first get on the bus, people seem surprised that a young 'Dauntless' is riding it, but then they see my alarmingly big bump, they look the other way. During the trip to Erudite, I can't help but to think of my baby. I don't know what to hope for. A boy, that looks like Tobias or a girl that looks like me. Will it have a little of both of us? There are thousands upon thousands of names to choose and I haven't even thought of where he or she will stay. Caleb's old room or mine?

My mind is buzzing with thoughts that I almost miss my drop off. It's nearing three and the sun is still a burning ball of energy. The days are growing longer due to the fast approaching summer. The light reflecting off the big glass compound is so blinding that I have to use my hand to shield my eyes. When I get to the door of the baby sector, some young man with greasy black hair and multiple piercings. Tattoos crawl up his neck, encircling it like a python. He's defiantly Dauntless, but he seems fairly young. A year or two older than me. He seems enraged about something, because the way he slams the glass door shut, you would think he'd might break it. He sees my staring at him and his lips form a smirk.

"Can I help you?" his voice raspy and raw.

"No, excuse me," I try and walk pass, but he grips my arm.

"I have never seen you before, born?" he questions.

"And raised," assuming he's asking about my Dauntless appearance. I snatch my arm back.

"Mmm, I'll be watching you," and he walks away. Without a name, or an apology.

I continue to my way into the complex. But when I get to the front desk, Cara is nowhere to be found. A young blonde girl sits in her place. She's beautiful. Her eyes are very eye-catching. One crisp blue, the other bold brown. Very unusual. And when I walk up her lips break out into a giant straight smile.

"Hello! How are you? How can I help you, Miss?" she says politely.

"Well, thank you, I'm here to see Cara for an ultrasound," I say, placing a hand over my stomach.

"Oh! Congratulations! Boy or girl?"

"That's why I'm here, I'm going to find out today," I smile.

"Tell me before you leave! Please? I'm sorry it's my first day here," she blushes.

"No worries, but I'll do that—tell you the sex," she hands me a clipboard.

"My name is Rhine, so if I'm not here, then tell the secretary that is here what the baby is and my name." I nod and go sit down in the waiting room, starting the paperwork.

(A/N: _Questions_ in _italics_; **bold** and _italics_ for her _**answers**_)

_Name: __**Tris Wright**__  
><em>_Original Faction: __**Dauntless**__  
><em>_Chosen Faction: __**Under sixteen**__  
><em>_Today's Date: __**February 29, 2180**__  
><em>_Date of Birth: __**January 19, 2165**__  
><em>_Date of Conception: __**October 8, 2179**__  
><em>_Due Date: __**June 5-8, 2180**__  
><em>_How Far Along: __**Twenty Weeks**_**  
><strong>  
>And the paper continued to ask me questions about my baby and how I was doing. When I completed the packet, Rhine told me to sit and wait until I'm called back. It felt like ages had passed before I hear Rhine's cheerful voice say:<p>

"Tris Wright! Room A108!"

I walk passed her, giving her a smile and a nod before going through the double doors. I stroll down the bright white walls that I have become so accustomed to, all the way until reach Room A108. Cara sits in front of a large screen, legs crossed and her glasses at the tip of her nose. She seems far to concentrated on the task at hand to even noticed I've made myself comfortable on the examination table. I twiddle my thumbs and swing my legs back and forth, over and over again, before I clear my throat. Cara nearly jumps out of her skin.

"Mother-fricker! Tris! You almost made me shit my skirt!" she places her hand on her chest, checking for a rapid pulse, I assume.

"I have been sitting here for the past...ten minutes, trying to get your attention," I say innocently.

"You could have been more subtle," she mumbles. "Anyways, how's things been going with the pregnancy?"

"Beside the asses that jeer at me in school, peachy," I say, sarcastically.

"Well, it was to be expected," she frowns. "On the upside, you can finally know what you are having," her frown quickly fades and a small smile replaces it.

"I suppose," my feeling getting the better of me. I lift my tank top and Cara wheels to the monitor, flipping the switch on. She stands and squirts some of the cold blue gel on my stomach. Chills run throughout my body. Half because of the cool sensation the gel leaves, but also from nerves. She then picks up the wand and swirls it around, trying to find the baby. Then the heartbeat monitor starts to beep and I can see its tiny outline, like a little person curled into a ball, fists clenched, eyes locked shut, and nothing can penetrate it. The heart is the strongest organ a human body has, but hearing its soft heartbeat, like a butterfly's wings flapping, so naïve, and everything is new. The past months have been worth it. Because now, now I know I will be a good mother, and I know what to do.

"Do you want to know the sex?" Cara asks, moving the wand around my swollen abdomen. I have waited ever since I found out I was pregnant to know. Will it be tall, dark, and out of this world gorgeous like its father or plain and ordinary like me? One way to find out.

"Yes." I squeak, tears filling to the brim of my eyes and my hands settle on the upper part of my tummy. Cara presses the wand deeper into my womb, before clicking the button that takes its picture. The film slides out of the printer machine, and Cara waves it around, drying the setting ink. She studies it for some time before her eyes flick up to mine.

"Congratulations! You are having a baby girl!" Her lips stretched so far apart, you would think her face could break in half. Girl. I guess I can stop calling her an _it_ or _the baby_. My mom and Chris wanted a baby girl. I guess some wishes do come true for some.

**A/N: I'm so sorry for those of you who wanted a boy:/ Just more people wanted a girl, so I decided to please them. See what happens when you review? Mmmh exactly! With Tris' paperwork, I tried to figure it out, so that was the best that I could do. Also I have been brainstorming some new names. I have been watching The 100, great series by the way, and I've found that I also like the names:**

**Clarke****  
><strong>**Octavia ****  
><strong>**Raven****  
><strong>**Thea****  
><strong>**Nora****  
><strong>**Jenna****  
><strong>**Haven****  
><strong>**Taylor****  
><strong>**Bethany**

**So, there's another list of names you guys can choose from! If you guys have read the Chemical Garden Trilogy, then you might have recognized Rhine! I do not own that series either...sadly. You guys are the best! Almost to a hundred reviews! Thank you so, so, so, so, very much for them. Those of you who don't...shame, shame;) Okay, enough of my rambling, as always thank you for reading, following/favorite-ing, and REVIEWING! Until next week...**

**Live Long & Prosper **


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: How I (Almost) Got Away******

_**(Thirty Weeks Along)**___

_Previously...__  
><em>_Cara presses the wand deeper into my womb, before clicking the button that takes its picture. The film slides out of the printer machine, and Cara waves it around, drying the setting ink. She studies it for some time before her eyes flick up to mine.___

_"Congratulations! You are having a baby girl!" Her lips stretched so far apart, you would think her face could break in half. Girl. I guess I can stop calling her an it or the baby. My mom and Chris wanted a baby girl. I guess some wishes do come true for some.__  
><em>  
>Climbing out of bed is starting to become a hassle. At thirty weeks, I feel like a balloon. I have to practically rock myself back and forth just to get enough momentum to get out of bed. Dad has been away for the past six weeks, due to a Candor problem, and since Candor is a three hour drive, he just decided to stay. Which was probably for the best or he would know about my baby girl.<p>

When I finally get out of bed and waddle over to the bathroom, I find the cool stone floor soothing to my burning feet. Out of the small window in the bathroom, a constant pounding of rain hits the sides of grey houses. I turn on the water to a mild scalding, because Cara says it helps breast growing pains, and stand until the heat make me drowsy and I have to sit down. Sitting down is not the best idea, since now it's going to take me even longer to get out of the tub.

With my legs sprawled out, the steaming water beating against my stomach. Time seems to have slowed. My eyelids have double on weight, so I struggle to keep them open, until the comforting darkness takes me.

_Screams. All I can hear is someone screaming at the top of their lungs. It isn't until my throat feels raw and my eyes open that I realize, it's me. I'm screaming. I look down and see that my baby bump has grown three times bigger and I'm being wheel around on a gurney. Another hit pounds the inside of my stomach, and I whimper. My cheeks slick with tears, spit is drooling down my chin and landing on a bed gown then is on me. ___

_"Please! What's happening? It hurts! Just get it out! Help me please!" I scream again. And again. My eyes are scrunched tight, my nails dig into my palms. ___

_"Tris, I need you to push as hard as you can on the count of three," a voice says. "Ready. One...two...three—push, push, push, push!" My back lifts off the bed and I force the baby out of me. I scream conjointly with the first cry of my baby. "Congratulations on your baby girl!" the masked doctor says, while handing me my daughter. But when I look at her face, it's faceless, like skin has grown over, making it just a soft surface. I start to panic. I can't breathe. I cry out for the doctor to come back, and a I'm fiddling with her, a shadow is standing in the doorframe. Just looking at the structure of this man I can tell it is, ___

_"Tobias?" my voice strains. ___

_"Why, Tris?" He walks forward, stopping when he gets to the foot of my bed. ___

_"Why what?" tears threaten to escape my eyes. ___

_"Why did you have her? I never loved you. I will never love her," he points at the sleeping baby in my arms, "You could have stopped this, never ruined my life. But you didn't. You selfish bitch!" he yells. ___

_"Selfish? You're the bastard who got me pregnant and left! I hate you!" Tears slip down my red cheeks. My heart pounds against my chest. I close my eyes and compose myself before saying, "I thought I loved you, when really, I didn't know what love really was. You took something away that I will never get back. You put your daughter into this world, yes I could have taken her out, but that is when I found out what love is. Not some fling you have with someone. Not having sex with them. Love is when you know your world will be a darker place without them."_

"Beatrice?" a familiar female voice coaxes. My eyes flutter open, my skin is ice cold. My neck and back are sore die to the uncomfortable position I've been in. "Honey, are you okay?" Mom softly knocks on the bathroom door. My chest rises and falls quickly. It was just a dream, I remind myself.

"Mom, can you help me up?" I call through the wooden door. The sound of the lock turning open fills the room and the door slowly opens.

"Sweetheart, how did you get on the floor of the tub?" she gently asks.

"I was tired and the water felt so good," my eyes are still heavy with sleep. "Can you help me?" I point to my bathrobe hanging from the hook behind the door. She turns around, grabbing the clothing, and walks to me with the robe outstretched.

With Mom's help, we were able to get me out of tub in less than ten minutes. While getting dressed I notice the deep purple lines that are running up and down my swollen stomach. I frown. I used to have abs, I was pale, but now I can't even see my toes.

Because it's just me and Mom, I wear a tight dark grey long sleeved V-neck and some black sweatpants. Since it's Sunday, no one in Abnegation works or go out of their houses. We are required to sit in with our families and reflect on our past week. It's nearly noon, and I still haven't eaten anything, but I can smell Mom's cooking. When I waddle down the stairs, I freeze.

My dad is sitting at the table with a cup of coffee in his left hand and a newspaper on the other. He looks up at me with a large grin plastered across his face.

"Sweetheart! I've been waiting—" he stops with his eyes wide and jaw loose. He looks at my stomach to Mom, the back to me. His smile fades into a straight line. His ears and neck turn red with anger.

"Daddy—" he cuts me off by standing, walking over to me, then striking me on the side of my face with the back of his hand, making me fall to the floor.

"Andrew!" Mom screams, running over to my side. I hold my throbbing cheek while Mom brushes the hair that has fallen back behind my ears. "What the hell is wrong with you!"

Dad stands there, surprised at his own action to even speak. His eyes soften and he drops to the floor on his knees. "Beatrice—I—I..." he stutters. Mom helps me up and I speed waddle up the stairs and slam the door behind me once I enter my room, sobbing harshly.

This reminds me of the day I met Tobias and Caleb freaked. With my dad being in his thirties and Caleb only fifteen at the time, this one stung far more.

I don't know how long it was until I heard the floorboards creak as someone approaches my bedroom. I cringe as my door opens and Dad walks in with a blank face. He settles down at the foot of my bed, mentally debating what he's going to say.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, like if he were to raise his voice I might break.

"No, I'm sorry, I'm a disgrace to our family—and I understand if you hate me," tears well up again. I know why he slapped me, I know why he's angry at me, because of me and my choices.

"Beatrice, you're not a disgrace, just a girl who made an awful, horrible mistake. I don't hate you, because hating you would be like hating apart of myself. I only have one question..." he stops and looks at me, I nod. "Whose is it?" I can feel the color drain from my face.

"Dad—" I start but he holds up his hand, and I flinch back, thinking that he might hit me again. I can see the hurt filling his eyes, and his and curls and drops into his lap.

"Please, I just want to know, I won't ask any more questions, I promise," he pleads.

I take a deep, shaky breathe, closing my eyes, not wanting to see his reaction. "Tobias...Eaton."

"Tobias Eaton?" he rolls the name around in his mouth, cringing while doing so. His eyes flicker up to mine, momentarily. "Marcus' boy? The traitor who left for Dauntless a few months back is the father of your child?" he narrows his eyes on my bump. I nod. With that, he carries himself down stairs, where I hear the front door slam shut.

Moments later I hear voice yelling from next door, and I look out my window that faces the Eaton house. Dad's face is contorted in anger and Marcus' with confusing. I only catch a few words. Daughter, impregnated, traitor's, none of these word make Dad look any happier.

Marcus' eyes lock onto mine from the window, and I jump back. Now two enraged men are coming back to my house.

"Beatrice!" Marcus yells. And when I don't go down stair, he climbs up the stairs in search of me. He comes crashing down in my room, his thick finger pointed accusingly at me, "What is this lie that my son got you pregnant?" Dad comes in shortly after.

"My daughter does not lie! Your son took advantage of a young innocent girl! Which happens to be my—my daughter!" Dad shouts at Marcus.

"My son was a good man—" Dad cuts off Marcus.

"If he was so good then way did he leave our faction?" Dad hisses. I wince when I remember Tobias's reason for why he left me. The ripples across his bare back; old fade scars that thy monster put on him. When Marcus is quiet and notices, he composes himself, clearly his throat.

"He has to—be his own person, and I wasn't going to stop him," Marcus saves. I silently scoff. Dad nods in understanding. Of only Dad knew the monster I've seen.

**A/N: Papa Prior knows his little girl's secret now, bitches! I'm just messing with you guys! Thank you guys so so so so so so much for reviewing on my last chapter, 41 reviews for the last chapter! I cannot thank you guys enough. I tried my hardest to think how Andrew would take it for weeks, then I finally pick up the phone and asked my Dad how he would take that kind of news and that's what I went off of. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and a few were asking when Tobias is going to come Ito the picture...this is a thirty chapter long fandom, so he's going to come in around the 17th chapter or so. This is also the last week you guys can vote on names and here is the leading names:******

**Thea-13****  
><strong>**Raven-10****  
><strong>**Taylor-10****  
><strong>**Bethany-5****  
><strong>**Jenna-5****  
><strong>**  
><strong>**So I'm really rooting for Thea, because I think the whole family's first letter in their name: Tobias, Tris, Thea...get it? Plus I think Theadora is an Abnegation name. But it's up to you guys! Thank you so muck for reviewing and I hope to seen more like that this week. Until next week...******

**Love Long & Prosper**


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